Why did the tree stay home from school? Because, trees don't have school.

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Yo mama so poor that she's having trouble making ends meet without government assistance.

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Bob: "Did you eat my sandwich?" Alex: "I am your sandwich."

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A cow walks down the stairs. Not really. They are incapable of walking down stairs. It actually died on the roof.

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Yo mama's so poor that she's living in poverty.

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what did the elephant step on when he was running through the jungle? .... a coke machine.

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Why did the dinosaurs go extinct? Well many scientists have theorized that a giant meteor hit the earth causing the extinction of most living things. Also if your christian : Dinosaurs never existed, evolution is the devils work, science is not the answer to the world's problems. Darwin was a foolish man, and thats that.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Systemic oppression.

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Every human being has some kind of penis <3

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What does rainbow stand for? Rick Astley Is Nesting By Our Window to harass us

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What do you catch a baby with? A pitchfork

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What's brown and sticky? a stick.

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Why was the black man tangled in chains at the bottom of the ocean? Because he was a highly skilled diver and environmentalist who tragically entangled himself and consequently died slowly and painfully of suffocation while trying to save a whale from eating waste metal.

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what do a plane and a mouse have in common? nothing

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whats the difference between valium and m & ms ? one is,nt a tasty little chocolate

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Why did the potato cross the road? It didn't. A potato is a vegetable. It cannot walk, think or speak.

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Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in the mud, and cross back again? Because he was a dirty double crosser

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What did the cop say to the people watching the house fire? All right nothing to see here jokes over

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Alex Eggbert

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*Dubstep* CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW BWAB BWAB

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Your mom is so fat that her Body Mass Index is 30,?which is considered obese, she should really try to lose some weight.

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How do Chinese people name their kids? The couple discuss possible names and then pick the one that they feel suits the child best.

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What's worse than some one spitting in your food Hitler revealing he's actually a Jew

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What's worst than realizing your mom is actually a transvestite? Simultaneously realizing this means you are adopted

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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