whats worse than being ugly? being aivy.

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson like toast? Because he's dead.

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" Hey you have something on your face. " ( man speaking punches the guy he was talking to ) " It was pain."

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Your Mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late, great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

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How much is a pet whale? $1350.99

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What's worse than stepping on a snail? Stepping on a bear trap.

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whats up and also down? your mum

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What is green and had wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.....

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What is matt dalys favorite thing in the world? penis

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Cripples are lame.

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What did the black guy do to the hooker, he took her dead body out of his trunk

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead. Q: Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? A: Because it was stapled to the monkey.

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how do you make a blonde snowman? hollow out the head.

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? seriously all my friends r jerks n break the door down...wow ur polite....um ok WHO'S THERE? THE REAPER oh sh** dude! NO ONES HOME! "in other news this evening, two local men found dead on theyre living room floors. Police say the front door was smashed in...an obvious sign of forced entry. The two men were apparently reading a webpage called anti-joke before suddenly having an unexplained heart attack and dieing....heh heh hey nancy...why did the chicken cross the road? because he thuroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic." "HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.......GASP! GA FA! GAA *gargle*" "wow...in other OTHER news i just killed nancy...."*runs* JOKES KILL >:}

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2 out of 4 questions. How do you get an elephant in a fridge? Open it, take the girrafe out, put the elephant in, and close it.

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why did the husband always work late nights? he needed the extra hours to provide for his family

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roses are red, violets are blue my name is hitler, good bye jew

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How did the suicide bomber die? Cancer.

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What is funnier than an uncontrolled explosions? Most things, because explosions damage property, and cause deaths.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he clearly has an owner that doesn't fence him in.

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Why did the orange fall asleep? Because its never awake.

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Who is the girl that has had sex with over 10 guys? Georgia Hidi

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what does a man with no leg say to a woman with one eye? hello. by Mad James

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What did Chuck Norris say when he saw a cop -Hi

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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