A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all on a deserted island with no food or water. The redhead decides to try and swim to safety, but after a few hours of swimming she becomes to tired to carry on and drowns. After knowing their friend died, the two other women decide that swimming is not a viable option for rescue, so they decide to stay on the island. A few days later a search party rescues them.

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What is orange, has 7 legs, and makes the same noise as a crow? If you can think of something that fits all of those characteristics, you need help

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So, a screw driver walks into a bar, and the bar tender sais "Hey Screw Driver" we have a drink named after you" the screw driver goes, "Really? You have a drink named Bob"

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Roses are red violets are blue I suck at poetry show me your tits!!

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What's the easiest way to become filthy rich? There are many ways to earn money. Invest some time into researching the topic.

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What do gamer see in his nightmare? a peasant build 4 houses and gets stuck between them.

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What did the three year old say when he dropped his milk? Shitting buggery!

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What are the first three words in a Mexican Cook Book? Steal a chicken.

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What's one plus one? 2. Two legit, two legit to quit, hey, hey... What's one plus two? 3. Easy as abc, 123, abc, baby you and me. What's one plus three? 4. hes a jolly good fellow, for he's a jolly good fellow.

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Your friend says "Hi" What do you say back? You say "chunky salsa?" She said "what?" You think she knows you made out with her boyfriend last night. So... You blurt out " I'm SO sorry I made out with your boyfriend lastnight" Know.... Your dead meat.

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Why are pills white? Cause they work.

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Why did the Mexican cross the border? He wanted to live a better life in pursuit of freedom and a better job.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have alzheimers, Cheese Toast!

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Lol, listen, the suggestion lies in the "not not", you are using not twice in your mind, which under trance makes it so your subconcious registers that you are using a double negative while you consciously do not. Look back at the messages and register consciously that you and I have been using "not not" twice during the past messages, when the net shuts down here, you reinforce the "I will totally notnot, tell him" so the suggestion just gets stronger.

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Why don't you play cards with a cheetah? It will attack you.

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1 woman and 2 guys were on a roadtrip. Every single day they would go do the same things. First go to Denny's, then to the mall, then see a horror movie. One day the woman said, "I don't want to go see the horror movie, I'm scared enough!" So the guys agreed that they'd trick the woman into going to a horror movie before Denny's. They went, and the woman was scared out of her mind. She yelled at them both for 30 minutes and to this day never speaks to them.

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Knock Knock Why are you knocking? I have a doorbell.

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There was a fat man crying. I just told him the local Mc D's was arson attacked.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing set? She had no arms.

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What did Hitler say when he was dying? He said, "I'm dying."

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What happened the magic tractor? It turned into the feild!

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? cheese.

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What did grandma receive for her 75th birthday? Alzheimer's.

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roses are red, violates are blue, you left me for David, I am about to kill you *bam* *bam**bam*

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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