How many jews can you fit in a car? 2 in the front, 2 in the back, and 50 in the ashtray.

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What's black and white and red all over. An interracial suicide pact.

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A traveling salesman stops at a farmer's house. The farmer then offers the salesman a bed with his daughter. The salesman quickly replied, "I don't want to go to bed right now. I need to know the way to Pawtucket." The farmer then gave the salesman directions and the two parted ways.

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Rose's are red, Violet's are blue, I have a gun... Get in the van!

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Q:Why do people not live forever? A: Because they die dumbass.

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Why did the man fall off his bike? Because he wasn't on a bike.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Paul and Steve, Siamese twins attached at the head, come to a fork in the road they are traveling. Paul wants to go left, while Steve wants to go right. They pause for a moment to figure out which direction would be the best choice for the both of them. They decide to go Paul's way, and as they continue to travel in silence, they try to imagine what life as a self-reliant individual would be like.

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Lindsay Lohan

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Why did the man laugh as he sat in the electric chair? He was being tickled by the guard.

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What's the difference between a pile of rotting shit about to be re-heated in the microwave and Kevin James's new movie "The Zookeeper" ... Nothing.

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Q: whats a bunny's favorite music genre A: smooth jazz

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What happened when the chicken crossed the road? The Farmer immediately noticed the oncoming car and flagged it down so the driver would stop and he could grab his chicken and carry it safely back to the coop

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a duck walks up to a lemonade stand. thats impossible, because nature says that ducks cannot walk.

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Rarity: "So, what is that splendid frock of yours saying?" Maud Pie: "It doesn't talk. It's a dress."

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Q.What do you call a beaver with a unibrow. A. A beaver........it's still a beaver

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Why is the sky blue? Because when you look up at the sky, especially during the daytime, the sky is giving a bluish color.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

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Why did the car break down? Because breakfast was done.

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Why did the black man have blood on his hands? He was a surgeon

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Why couldn't the boy see? He was dead

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why did the clown stop laughing? because it got hit by an axe

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What does rainbow stand for? Rick Astley Is Nesting By Our Window to harass us

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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