What happened to the dying kangaroo? He died What animal is not in the lion king? Kangaroo --why? Because he died...

There's a priest, doctor, and blonde on a plane. At the end of the flight they all go their separate ways.

Why are Holocaust locations so expensive? They were mass acres.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

Why'd Carly fall off the swing? She got hit by a bus

How do you make a retard make a sound like a dog? Douse him in gasoline and light him on fire. WOOF!

Why did the elephant cross the road? It was being poached

A duckling is following its mother, but gets separated. Noticing that her child is lost the mother duck calls out, and the duckling finds her quickly.

A man walked into a bar. He was meeting his friends but was 30 minutes early so he went down the road to buy some food. He had recently began dieting after watching a series of lifestyle programs which informed him of the potential risks involved with high cholesterol and blood pressure levels. He purchased a garden salad and a freshly squeezed orange juice, and made it back to the bar in time to meet his friends.

What did the suicide bomber say to the other suicide bomber? You're da bomb!

Why was Johnny crying? Because... Because... Because... Because... Because... Because of the wonderful things he does.

Joey mayer's face

An asian and white guy walk into a bar, the white man says to the asian "Do I know you from somewhere?" The asian says. "Yes, I used to go to college with you." The white man remebers him, and they catch up on life.

Q- what did the magician say after the sawed the woman in half ? A- call an ambulance !

In the North people say "once upon a time." What do people in the South say? "Y'all never gonna believe dis shit!"

A man was walking down the street He was then killed in a drive by.

women's rights

PICKLES

Your Mom is so fat... I'm sorry I didn't mean that.. I have abandonment issues.

What's worst than a crying baby? A dead baby What's worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies What's worse than a pile of dead babies? If there's an alive one at the bottom What's worse that an alive baby in a pile of dead babies? If it has to eat its way out.

Want to hear a joke? Unequal rights.

I like doodle. XoXo Jamie

Do you work at subway? Because you are giving me a footlong. Yes, please, on white bread, with turkey, ham, white cheddar, and all of the vegetables. Maybe a little bit of sweet onion sauce and sub sauce. Sure, that will be a combo with chips. Thank you very much.

Why was there an awkward silence? Because numerous people gathered in a room were not talking.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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