Why did the blond get fired from the M&M factory? Repeated absences and stealing.
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A platypus walks into a bar. They are the only mammals with the ability to lay an egg.
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A man walks into a bar. Except it was a metal bar, like a pole. So he got hurt.
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Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They finally get to Florida and they see a sign that says "Disneyworld: left" so they take the left and have a wonderful time at what many people believe to be the most magical place on Earth.
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How do you kill a blonde? Well there are many ways, but all of which are wrong because murder is illegal.
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Q: How many Jew does it take to change a light bulb? A: A lightbulb cannot be changed, it either is or isn't. Do you mean replace a burned-out bulb with a new one? With design, logistics, manufacturing, marketing of just that single bulb- there are many people involved. It could be argued that we all play some small part in the process.
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An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can't talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it's a bird of prey.
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What do you call 100 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A horrible boating accident.
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There was a man from Dundee. who's limericks always ended on line three. I don't know why.
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Why did grandpa climb the phone pole with bananas in a backpack? He has a debilitating disease. He is slowly losing touch with reality.
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What do you call a man with no arms or legs on the doorstep? Whatever his name happens to be.
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