What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Domestic violence is a crime. She should leave her abusive partner and seek help.

How do you get a clown off of a swing? Hit him with an axe

A white guy, a black guy, and a spanish guy jump off a building. They all die on impact and their families mourn their loss for years to come.

Today I decided to burn alot of calories. So I found a fat kid and lit him on fire.

And the Lord said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.

i like boobs haha ha hahaha

what did the plane say to the trade center on 9/11 boom

8=>

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Well, it's really nice.

If life throws you melons, you might be dyslexic.

Three blind mice walk into a pub. They are all unaware of their surroundings, so to derive humor from it would be exploitative.

Try this on someone... go up and say "Ive got a great knock knock joke for you but you have to start" there response "Ok, knock knock" you say "Who's there?" They are usually dumbfounded and a hilarious awkward silence ensues

Do you know what's the difference between a bicycle and a black man? A bicycle is an object and a black man is a human being.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

A seal walks into a club.

What's funnier than a pile of dead babies? Just about anything because child mortality is not funny.

Why did the chicken commit suicide? To get to the other side

Today I was reading anti jokes. At first I didn't get it, but then I figured it out and...ah crap, why am I writing this, it's just going to get thumbed down...

A dog walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender goes to get him a drink, but then realizes how ridiculous this is and wakes up from his dream. He rolls over to tell his wife about it, but she ignores him. He begins to cry silently, realizing his marriage is in shambles.

Dislike this, and I kill myself.

A Christian and an Atheist are in a bar, the christian says "if you don't believe in god you will go to hell." the atheist replies "if there was a benevolent supreme being, logic dictates that there would be proof of his existence other than a 2,000 year old book." they agree to set aside their petty differences and get on with their lives.

Your mom is so fat that when she dives into a pool she displaces a proportionately larger volume of water than people with less body mass.

What do u call an anorexic with a yeast infection? -a quarter pounder with cheese. (not really anti-joke, im a girl and thought this was funny lol)

Why did the blond get fired from the M&M factory? Repeated absences and stealing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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