What's black, blue, and red all over? A baby after I kill it

How do you tell if a kitten is alive? Throw it at the wall.

They found Michael Jackson dead in his house and found Madeleine McAnn in the cupboard 8P

You know what helps with back pain? If you lick my butt hole.

Q: Why can't white people dunk? A: because they can't jump high enough

How many retarded mexicans can you fit in a smart car? Two.

What did Helen Keller name her children? Nothing, since she didn't have any.

You must be Jamaican cause you have long dreadlocks and you are listening to Bob Marley

Knock Knock.. Who's There? Boo.. Boo Who? Book...

What do you call a black pilot? A niigger

Whats the difference between platinum blondes? Absolutley nothing they all look exactly the same.

A lady forgot to feed her goat. When she went to feed it, It wasn't there. Why? She didn't have a goat. Another lady forgot to feed her cat. When she went to feed it, it wasn't there. Why? It died 2 days earlier. A man forgot to feed his cow. When he went to go feed it, it wasn't there. Why? They had ate it for dinner last night. A teenage boy forgot to feed his hamster. When he went to feed it, it wasn't there. Why? He spent so much time playing video games that it ate itself. So the boy had his mom make him a sandwich.

There are two types of people in this world: those who can count and those who can't. I happen to be one of those who can.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have a dick just for you

Lard and Liz lard,lard and Liz

An Irishman, an American, an Australian, a Chinese man, a Turk, a Brazillian, a Canadian, a Jew, an African, a German, a Mexican, a Norweigian, a Swede, a Spaniard, a Russian and an Indian walk into a bar.

Tell me a joke Tell me a joke! TELL ME A JOKE!!! ...Womens Rights

yo mama is so fat she has to wear large sized clothing

John: Hey Pablo why are you standing outside Home Depot. Pablo: Because I work here.

Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? No? Well, he graduated in 4 years with a degree in chemical engineering due to his diligence and good work ethic. He now has a well paying job that allows him to support his wife and two kids and to pay the mortgage on their large home.

What's bue and sticky? -A blue stick.

A black guy walks into a basketball court.

Yeah, and speaking about spiderman, I got some weird senses, when I get stressed things begin seeming slower, and gets a weird blur effect, not sure what it is, but if you know what "bullet hell video games are" Technically games where you play as a tiny spaceship and lots of bullets fly around, I was always awesome at those games as a kid, because the more stress I felt while playing, the slower my perception of time felt.

I don't know what was a bigger disappointment, the series finale of "Lost" or--sorry I thought I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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