What did the pornstar do after the film shoot? Called her parents and said she had a good day at work as a receptionist at a law firm. She is too ashamed to admit her real profession to them. She then cried profusely.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the Jew run across the road? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How you your turn a trashcan into a semi-automatic AK-47? You don't. But ask the irishman who just said "hello" to you.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Scenario- A wedding while skydiving. Problem- The groom lost his parachute. Question- Who stole it? Hint- The Maid of Honor didn't have one either, but he had one on his body when he hit the ground. Answer- The mailman, but he died of old age.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why can't Susie jump rope? Because she has no arms. Knock knock! who's there? Not Susie.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A man walked into a bar. He sustained a mild concussion and a brusied pelvis

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Hey we just met And this is crazy But my name's Kony And I stole your baby

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A Priest and a young child walk into a dark alley.... It leads to a church and he talks to the young boy about God

thumb_up thumb_down +8

roses are red violets are blue just telling you in case you didnt know

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the chicken cross the road? A: This is a highly unlikely circumstance due to the fact that there are no wild chickens and most chicken coops are nowhere near a road

thumb_up thumb_down +8

how do you wake up lady gaga you poke her face

thumb_up thumb_down +8

69 :)

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A policeman walks into a bar. He goes inside to greet his friend who happens to be the bartender. Another man walks into the bar. This man is a regular customer and goes to the bar almost every other night. The policeman leaves and goes back on duty.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock knock. Who's there? Come in.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Turn around.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How do you stop a baby from crawling in cirlcles? nail its hand to the floor

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: What do you call 500 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A: A Good Start.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's worse than opening your pantry door and finding nothing desirable to eat? Repeated high voltage electrical shocks to the anus.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

You ask a German how long it takes to go from Berlin to Amsterdam. He replies, ''About four hours by tank."

thumb_up thumb_down +8

squirrels with massive bonerss

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why didn't God show up to Jesus' bar mitzvah? Because he doesn't exist.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man walks into a bar Then another man shoots him in the head because he has anger issues.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops