What is a quicker way to transfer money than electronic banking? Keeping it on one's person and getting mugged for it, or else handing it over in a mutual deal.

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A bar walks into a man. The drink orders a bartender. And then the money walks home. End The.

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair, Therefore no one knew why his name was Fuzzy Wuzzy.

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What did Charlie Sheen say to Rebecca Black? If you care about the punchline I hate you.

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Why did the yeti make an omlette? To practise making omlettes.

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"Do you live in the United States?", said the man. "no." said the other man, "cool beans", said the woman.

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What do you do when your internet goes down? You right click on the internet connection and try to fix the problem.

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Yo momma's so fat, she slipped into a diabetic coma.

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Q: What did the chinese guy say to his friend? A: ??

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Most of these Anti-Jokes are Anti-Anti jokes, which makes them funny, if they were actually Anti-Jokes they wouldn't be funny at all.

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When life throws you knives, you're probably dead

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Why did the pineapple cry? It didn't, because it's a pineapple.

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A zebra dies and goes to animal heaven. All the animals around him are trotting, flying, jumping, each according to its own species, in the kind of bliss that only eternity can bring. But the zebra is not impressed and mopes through heaven's green fields. A giraffe notices his languid stupor and asks, "Why so glum, pal?" The zebra mournfully replies, "All my life I've wondered if I was black with white stripes or white with black stripes." The giraffe, hoping to get the zebra to some answers as quickly as possible, suggests, "Why not go as God?" The zebra, somewhat taken aback by the notion that God might give him an audience, replies, "Oh, I can do that?" The giraffe says, "Sure, I'll show you the way!" The giraffe leads the zebra to a great tabernacle of gold and points the way up a long stairway of diamond. The zebra follows the stairs up to two great ivory doors. But no matter what he tried, the zebra couldn't get the door open. The only animals that could open the door for him would be the primates because of their opposable digits, but the zebra wasn't much of a social animal, so he didn't have any friends. He spent eternity with no answer to his question.

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Knock Knock Who's there? its the police mam your son has been killed by a hit and run driver, the driver was an alcohol

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everyone. - Blake Woodman

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Q. How do you get a black man out of a tree? A. You get a ladder and help him down

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How do you trap a squirrel? You carefully set up a trap and place acorns in the trap.

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What did suzie do when she dropped her cookie? She died because it was secretly a bomb

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If an ear could talk what would it say? Probably nothing because it doesn't have a tongue...

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What is the opposite of Christopher Walkins? Christopher Reeves

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Why doesn't Lucinda have a penis? Because she's Mexican.

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Build a man a fire and he will be warm for a night, set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

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What are vampires favorite drink? Vampires aren't real.

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tobi packs fudge+parkers gay-sami

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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