what was the biggest game of hide and seek? World War II and the Jews won

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What did the Beatrice do after she got kicked off of X Factor? she went to a nearby store and bought a slim jim

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Q:If an apple and an orange had a politicial debate, what would it concern? A:Nothing important.

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Why did the black kid fail his math test? Because he had down syndrome

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So I was sitting in the doctor's when I noticed a guy sitting about two seats down, wearing a sombrero and pouring salt over himself. Then I found out I had cancer and promptly lost all interest in him.

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Why did Helen Keller always ride in the passenger seat? so she could SUCK THE DRIVERS D!CK!!!!!!!!!

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Why couldnt the car move? It got blown up by a tank.

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Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees an officer standing on a street corner and a pile of burning rubble behind him. He asks the officer what happened and he replies "A bomb fell from the sky and annihilated the city orphanage. 214 children were killed and two nearby families of 3 and 6 were severely injured and are now in the hospital with no hope of survival." The man was found dead later that week with a self-inflicted gunshot wound to the head.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing

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Knock knock. Who's there? Apple. Apple who? Apple juice.

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Q: What happened when Bob the Super-mega-ultra man, in his hurry to return an item that was objectively proven to be hazardous to physically normal people, banged his head very hard against a wall of a random building that was located on his route of travel? A: He recieved a concussion and had to coalesce in bed for a long time in order to return back to his regular style of living. Bob was merely a nominal 'Super-mega-ultra' man. He gets hurt practically as easily as anyone else.

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Why did the man go bald? He had cancer

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Why did Sally eat popcorn? She was watching a movie

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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why did ryan go to bed? because he is a growing boy and need it to keep in line for his study's i lied about him sleeping hes dead he was abducted

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It is Scientifically proven that, if you have a shower in china... you get wet

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I am a joke. I am funny.

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Eight hours? Sigh, leave it to me then! We both know you are a sweetheart behind that thick skull of yours, I mean why would you ask if it bothers me then?

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What was Hellen Keller's favorite color? Velcro.

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my name is Jacob sartorious

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Lets go Yankees

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whatts blue and fuzzy? Blue fuzz

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"knock knock" "whos there?" there was no response from the other side but the knocking continued, the homeowner felt distressed so phoned the police...

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Why was the guy sad? His son killed himself after being constantly bullied for 6 years.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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