Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a bed? A: The victim of a serious car accident in a hospital bed.

All your base are belong to us. Shame on you for making fun of the Japanese. They can't help their broken English sometimes. How would you like it if someone were to nitpick about every single word you typed? Yeah, bet you wouldn't like that, would you? Would it make you feel a bit more guilty to know these people suffered through a horrible earthquake and tsunami - and still managed to survive? Huh? Or that they continue to outshine most other countries in the world in the field of high-technology? Sure, maybe they DID blow up Pearl Harbor in 1941 and send us reeling into another World War. Everyone makes mistakes. Based on the past, "All your base are belong to us" seems pretty trivial now, doesn't it? Go apologize to a Japanese man right now, and never speak of this again.

Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? It had no legs.

Why did the chickens leave McDonalds? Because they refused to have their nuggets deep fried (Wyndellberg)

Roses are red Violets are blue i cant ryme or spell.

How do you kill chuck norris? With a gun...from 40 feet away

Why did the 16 yearold pregnant girl cross the road? To get to the abortion center

I am not racist., I have a black man in my family tree! He is still hanging there

knock knock get lost!

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, All you HATERS of Bieber, Go sick your mother.

just sit down and dont be a Jew

Bean.

U mad?

Q: What is that white stuff in chicken shit? A: Thats chicken shit too

Where did Lil' Suzie go after the explosion? Everywhere.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, a bus hit it half way along and it died instantly.

What's the cookie monster's favorite kind of cookie? Oreos

Whats luckier than finding a lucky penny? winning the lottery.

And the Lord said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.

How did the prisoner escape from prison? He asked to leave.

What is translucent and smells like a carrot ? A translucent carrot.

What color is the white cup? It's blue because it has two handles.

Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

What's the difference between a duck? One of its feet are both the same.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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