Q: How do you kill an Asian? A: Deprive of calculator or shoot it.

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Q: Where did little Suzie go during the bombing? A:Everywhere

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What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

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What's black and white and red all over? A car in which some young hoodlum appears to have splashed a fair amount of red paint over the owner's otherwise charming checker pattern.

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A horse walked into a bar and ordered a drink. It was nothing out of the ordinary because the Everett-Wheeler interpretation of quantum mechanics is correct and he lived in a parallel universe in which the roles of humans and horses are reversed.

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1: Ask if I'm a truck. 2: Uh... Are you a truck. 1: No.

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A lion walks into a barber shop and asks for a haircut and the barber says no then the lion proceeds to kill everyone in the shop

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So a moose walks into a grocery store and asks the clerk, who is a penguin, "Where's the bread?" And the penguin says "On isle three!" But, when the moose gets to isle three... The bread isn't there!

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Debating on internet is like competing in the paralympics, even if you win you're still retarded

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sit on your hand until it goes numb and then touch yourself.

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender shoots him.

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? You hit it in the face with an axe.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? A Boy Scout comes home from camp.

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Where do you find a dog? At a pet store.

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why did the lady fall on the ground? The cord for the parachute was cut by her husband

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What do you do when a man in a corner offers you candy? You walk away.

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I am nobody Nobody is perfect Therefore, I am perfect

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what has 2 legs and is red all over? Half a cat.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey was a dead. Don't you dare laugh. Asshole.

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Whats worst then finding drugs under you brothers bed finding your dead cat under his bed whats worst then finding your dead cat under your brothers bed finding your dead Gran whats even worst then that the Holocaust

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Justin Bieber is so gay he dates girls

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What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Sex.

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If you see a fat man, what do you say to him? Hopefully nothing mean, seeing as that would be demoralizing to the fat man.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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