A Jew and a German walk into a bar.

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How did the man jumping out of the plane at 33,000 feet survive? Because he had a parachute

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I was looking out the window on a Sunday morning. The coffee was fresh, and the air was moist. I had recieved a phone call last night on the contents of a briefcase that was to be left on my front door today. The explination was vague, and I was told to enjoy my last day. Then I died.

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How do you make a homeless person cry? cut an onion in front of him.

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What do you call a black priest? A black priest

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I was reading this book one time..... and my imagination took me away to many lands and times.

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Why was the man called Big Larry? His name was Larry and he was morbidly obese.

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Joe Paterno walks into a police station.

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What's worse than dropping an ice cream cone? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Dropping two ice cream cones.

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What do people say when a dyslesic person scores a goal in soccer good job that was a nice goal

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Why did the lights turn off? Because I turned them off.

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Did you hear about the mail man without a mail truck? He walked

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Q: What do you do when you meet someone new? A: You don`t know and expect me to do so? Get a life!

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What did the pear say to the plum? Nobody knows - the plum was deaf and didn't hear, the pear knows only dirty words in sign language, and there was nobody else around to overhear.

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Friend's are like pinguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

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Call of Duty is Awesome So is fingering a dead lion with an iron dildo

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A Scotsman, an Englishman and an Irishman walk into a bar and the barman asks "Is this some kind of a joke?"

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapiens, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

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what did the black man say to the white girl? He respectfully asked her out on a date and theyve been happily dateing ever since.

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How do you get a priest to cry? Stab him.

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SUBway eat fresh ZOMbies eat fleash

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How do you make a wall a darker shade of red? You throw the baby harder.

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knock knock Who's there? ... Hello?

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Why are there no swimming pools in Mexico? The average yearly income is $3,523, and pool chemicals are very expensive.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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