whats 2 + 2? a black guy flying a kite

3 guys walk into a bar. The fourth guy ducks.

Knock, Knock Who's there? Milkman! Milkman who? ....Timmy....I've been coming here for FOURTEEN YEARS! AND YOU CAN'T EVEN REMEMBER MY NAME?!?! I drove your mom to the hospital when you were born since your father is such a deadbeat. I helped pick out your name!! I'm sorry I wasn't born into wealth like you. I'm sorry I have to go door to door handing out milk for other people! I have been coming here every week for FOURTEEN YEARS! But no Timmy, no, don't try to remember my name. Just forget about all the laughs we have had. Or that time i left my family on Christmas because your mother needed me to go find you that Turbo man doll. I saved you from a burning vehicle! I helped you win your third grade science fair! Remember? I have a picture of us and that robot right here in my wallet. I show it to people all the time! Here's me and my...my pal Timmy. Well Timmy, this is it. You shan't see me again.

How do you make an anti joke? You ask a question that could have a presumably amusing answer, but make the joke less amusing by stating an obvious answer, therefore completely bamboozling the victim of the anti joke, and making you seem like a man that has a lot of common sense.

When life gives you lemons, take them. Free shit is cool

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Unless you're paralyzed.

You wanna see my secret freckle? NO! How about my butt? What!!!!!!!

if you can raed tihs steence it menas you are ceelvr eugnoh to uendnrstad tihs: no sex cusaes dgdoy eeys

Why was Sally crying She got a high five In the face With a chair

What do you call a man with a spade in his head? An ambulance.

Why did the chicken cross the road Time for you to get a watch

Batman, Superman, Spiderman and Wonder Woman walk into a bar. The bartender decides to ruin the joke by saying nothing.

What do you call white people that live in a trailer park? Residents.

Doris was putting up Christmas lights when he noticed the bulb's suddenly came on. He was puzzled at first, as he hadn't plugged them in. He climbed down the ladder and found that it was his son, Robby who had plugged the lights in.

Why did 3 blacks guys start watching the first Star Wars movie on Saturday night? They finished the Back to the Future movies on Friday.

What is the difference between a boyscout and a Jew? Boys outs come home from camp.

Why was Joey bad at playing the trumpet? He had no fingers.

How do you fit 100 jews in a car? It wouldn't work.. Nevermind.

Why did John fall down the stairs? Because John is a paraplegic and is incapable of going to down stairs without aid.

Why can't T-rex give hih fives, Because they're dead...

Why did the boy get stuck on the toilet? He was Elvis.

What do you call a gay dog? Steve

What happened to the jew that donated? Stop thinking, jews dont donate.

He I just met you, and this is crazy, but you sister just died here's her baby.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...