Q:What Did The Man Say When He Lost His Body A:Nothing He Die. Because If You Ever Lost Your Body You Would Die...

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How many Jews can you fit into a car? How ever many seats happen to be available.

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Why did my brother drive the speed limit? Because it's the law

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Why did the Mexican cross the border? He was being deporting because he over stayed his visa and is now an illegal immigrant

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A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

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What do you call a really old Cowboy? A senior citizen with a brain tumor.

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Yo mama smells so bad that she has no friends and killed herself.

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Why don't women need watches? Because they probably have a cell phone, which works just as well.

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knock knock who's there no one

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why was the kid sad? his fish died. he had to flush it down the toilet.

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what'd one jew say to the other jew? i cant eat this its ham. (sounds better when said with disappointed jew voice)

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How do you make bread out of corpses? You don't. You grow it with bread seeds.

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What did the banker say to the other banker? We're both bankers!

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what's the difference between "rita , sue and bob too ," and rocky II ? rocky II is about boxing

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I tell the Doctor I'm having pains in my chest. He says that sounds serious and admits me immediately to the hospital.

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How do you drown a down syndrome child? Put him/her into water.

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What did the Ginger get for Christmas? A: a soul

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Human: "Panda get off that slide! Your a panda, you don't understand gravity!" Panda: g=9.81 m/s squared. Human: Oh, I see, carry on.

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Why shouldn't you drink and drive? Because you might hit a bump and spill your drink.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple-sized tumor in your colon

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Violets are Blue, Roses are Red, skip the bull$%!#, and give me head

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Racism is like black people... It should not exists...

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Q: What did the blonde woman say? A: My hair is blonde

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A ginger a blond and a burnett where walking in the dessert... They died of heat exhaustion.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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