Getting up, the 2nd hardest thing in the morning.

Knock. Knock. Who's there? lettuce lettuce who? Lett-uce be friends

what do u call a gay dinosaur megasoreass

Who has fair skin, blonde hair and is African? Stefan.

A Tatooine moisture farmer, an old man, an astromech droid, and a protocol droid walk into a cantina at Mos Eisley Space Port. The bartender says, "We don't serve their kind here! They'll have to wait outside. We don't want them here." The moisture farmer then says to his droids, "Listen, why don't you wait out by the speeder. We don't want any trouble."

Did you hear about the guy who got his entire LEFT side ripped off? He's dead.

Why did the penguin die? He was anti-social and would rather die than huddle. So he died. THE END

How will Jesse die? His mom doesnt have any food left (or money) so she eats him, and then jesse's fat little brother farts on his obese corpse

What makes a good jack-o-lantern? A pumpkin

So I was sitting in the doctor's when I noticed a guy sitting about two seats down, wearing a sombrero and pouring salt over himself. Then I found out I had cancer and promptly lost all interest in him.

Why does the gay person where a leather motorcycle suit? Because he drives motorcycles.

John - hey do you have tickets to see Oasis? Sam - No I bought green day tickets intead. John rolls his eyes at sam very dissapointedly then proceeds to go home. The next day Sam phones John excitedly telling him he traded his Green day tickets for Oasis tickets, a smile appears on Johns and Sams faces, not that they can see each other, they both then put the phone down. An African died. Green Day are a bad band.

Roses are red but violets arent blue!!!!!

Why was the ginger walking around in bare feet? He had no sole.

Q : whats the most annoying thing on the earth with a big fore head ? A : Paige

Whats the difference between a sandwhich and a dead baby? People eat sandwhiches.

A man walks into a bar... who cares what happens after that Charlie Sheen is winning and Osama Bin Laden is dead

KNOCK KNOCK who's there? hello is anybody there? hello?....... .....the number your trying to reach has been removed please hang up the door knob and put the squirrel back in the lawnmower were it belongs.

What's the difference between you and a mallet with a cold? Ones a sick duck...I forget what I was about to say but your mother is a whore

sometimes i wonder why is the frisbee getting bigger? then it hits me

Membean

Why did the chicken cross the road? He wanted to see the CN tower. He was then hit by a fridge dropped by people running tests on the top floor.

I'm a boy... I like hamburgers... Xbox is my favorite activity.... I have a dog... My dad is cheap... He's my doctor, my dentist, and my mom... Haha get it?

The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of problems with money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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