I see said the blind man to his def wife as the dog with no legs ran over

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Whats worse than a clock with no hands? Your mom with cancer.

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What did the cop say to the people watching the house fire? All right nothing to see here jokes over

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Hi

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Q: How much does it cost to have 50cent and Nickleback perform together? A: 45 cents, because its 50 cents, and you get a nickle back

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The president, Oprah and Abraham Lincoln are sitting in a crashing airplane. lol

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Q: Why did the boy fall off his bike? A: Someone threw a refridgerator at his head.

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Kim Kardashian got a job.

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What' do you call a fart in a box? Your mom's puzsy

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What's brown and smelly? Poop.

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How do you get a Jewish man out of a pool? Ask him politely, for I'm sure he's a pleasant and reasonable fellow.

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if dave has 50 candy bars and eats 45 what does he have? diabeties.

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What did Chuck Norris say when he saw a cop -Hi

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Why can't Brent speak at the moment? Because he is eating his ice-cream.

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What do you get wen u cross a cat and a walrus? Two animals with very different life styles.

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Man 1: Ask me if I'm a tree. Man2: Are you a tree? Man1: no.

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Why did the girl drop out of school? She was being sexually assaulted by her mothers alcoholic boyfriend and was having trouble coping.

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NASA sent a probe to Uranus and wondered why people were laughing.

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I said I hate niiggers

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What does Helen Keller's parents do when she gets in trouble? They leave the plunger in the toilet!!!

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Good question, probably because I cannot get enough focus to "put a spell" on anyone because of my allergy, I use "autocast" for the rest. "Put a spell" I have not heard that since I was 14, that's really oldschool, and kinda geeky, back then it was code talk... Which is also geeky unless it actually serves a good purpose. AAAND... I served my mandatory time in the army as a minesweeper, we got attacked by fucking allies because of a... Yeah, I killed, people on our same team, still bad people, they offed about everybody else until I showed up, long story short, yeah I offed four of them, but that's like ten years ago.. My turn, you really got a crush on me dont you?

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What do you call love at first sight? A broken heart.

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What do giant panda bears eat? giant bamboo

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Two men are making sandwiches, one man is spreading peanut butter over the bread and the other man is spreading honey and Italian raspberry jam over rye bread. the man with the peanut butter sandwich looks over and says "HEY, where did you get the rye bread?" and the man with the rye bread says "well my wife made it yesterday and I would be delighted if you come over for some tea, and tried some of my wife's homemade rye bread".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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