Violets are Blue, Roses are Red, skip the bull$%!#, and give me head

What did one guy say to another? Womens rights..........

justin beiber has a penis hahahahahahhaah lol not really

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms

Why did John stay home from school? He died.

You know what's funnier than 24? 25.

While I was walking home from school one day, James Brown jumped out of a bush and punched me in the face. Then, when I got home, there was a walrus sitting on my couch. He then turned to look at me and said, "Penis". I then immediately farted out blades of grass.

Whats the difference between an apple and an orange? A banana because a motorcycle has no windows.

one day 2 strawberrys walked to the ice cream store and ordered a small cup of banana ice cream they were realley happy they were later taken in and tortured and raped

jay hefti is so cool and alex askew is hot

why did the man fall off his bike? He got shot by the navy seals, He was a highly decorated terrorist.

why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it tried but was hit by a truck at the halfway point.

A man walks into a bakery and buys a doughnut. He then starts to drive home when he realised that he'd forgoten to eat the doughtnut and has to returne to do so.

Why did the kitchen cross the road?

Whats black and hangs from trees in my backyard? blackberries..

What do you look for in a woman? a pulse.

What did Chuck Norris say when he saw a cop -Hi

What is sad about a kid dying in a bus accident? The other 20 survived

Knock Knock? Who's There? Not a Jehovah's Witness, let me in!

TELL

Jon has 50 chocolate candy bars Jon eats 45 of them. What does Jon have? Diabetes...

What do giant panda bears eat? giant bamboo

I was sitting next to a man with jelly in one ear and peanut butter in the other, so I turned to him and said "Are you a trifle deaf?" and he said "No, I'm mentally ill."

Q. How do you make an oil lamp turn off? A. Break it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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