Knock knock. who's there? Alex. GO AWAY!!!

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Friends are a lot like snow You pee on them, they disappear

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A man went to his doctor and said, "Doctor, every time I hit my hand with a hammer, it hurts!" Then both him and his doctor died; so it didn't matter.

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Yo mamas so fat We are all concerned for her health

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Whats the difference between an oven and a fridge One is hot and the other is cold

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What did the chair say when someone sat on it? Nothing. The person's butt covered the chair's mouth.

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Do you like impressions? Why? That's Socrates

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A policeman walks into a bar. He goes inside to greet his friend who happens to be the bartender. Another man walks into the bar. This man is a regular customer and goes to the bar almost every other night. The policeman leaves and goes back on duty.

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What do you call an Irish man with no legs? Handicapped

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Why wasn't there an elevator in the rainforest? The rainforest is not capable of managing an elevator because an elevator does in fact require an energy source which is also not capable in a rainforest. The rainforest is filled with animals and is not filled with humans which would make having an elevator in the rainforest useless because the main use of an elevator is to transport humans. The animals in the rainforest would not be able to operate the elevator because using an elevator for them would be advance while humans using elevators is second nature.

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you know whats funny the letter Q

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Why did the surrealist go to the doctor? Knock Knock.

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why did the polar bear bury his face into snow? because he saw the 241543903 post and wanted to join in so he used a portal gun to teleport his head into some guy's freezer.

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Who did the Vampire bite? No one because vampires aren't real.

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What do I have in common with your mum? We're in the same bed right now.

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a gay man walks into a bar the bartender says "what'll it be today" he asks for a beer the bartender comes back with a beer because thats what he asked for.

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Why did the soviet plane crash? It was joseph Stallin

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What's the difference between your cat and mine? Yours has legs.

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What do you call a black woman that's blind and has 1 leg? Handicapped

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What is sad about a kid dying in a bus accident? The other 20 survived

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What's the difference between watermelon and baby? I don't eat watermelon.

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What is makes you more happy to see than a dead baby? A dead baby dressed up as a clown.

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knock, knock. come in.

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Why do Vampires Sparkle in the Sunlight? They don't read a proper Vampire Novel and see for yourself.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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