Q: whats better than having sex? A: nothing

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Well, there is no way to accurately estimate this number being that 1.woodchucks in fact do not chuck wood and 2. there is no time frame given for said action to take place

Why is Tom Garrick gay Answer- Because he is

Roses are red, Violets are blue, This doesnt rhyme, Microwave.

A man walks into a sporting goods store and pulls out a gun. Then he returns it and leaves.

A man stumbles up to the only other patron in a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink. "Why of course," comes the reply. The first man then asks: "Where are you from?" "I'm from Ireland," replies the second man. The first man responds: "You don't say, I'm from Ireland too! Let's have another round to Ireland." "Of course," replies the second man. I'm curious, the first man then asks: "Where in Ireland are you from?" "Dublin," comes the reply. "I can't believe it," says the first man. "I'm from Dublin too! Let's have another drink to Dublin." "Of course," replies the second man. Curiosity again strikes and the first man asks: "What school did you go to?" "Saint Mary's," replies the second man, "I graduated in '62." "This is unbelievable!", the first man says. "I went to Saint Mary's and I graduated in '62, too!" About that time in comes one of the regulars and sits down at the bar. "What's been going on?" he asks the bartender. "Nothing much," replies the bartender. "The O'Kinly twins are drunk again."

the police there was several calls from people in the sarounding area who heard screaming from ur basement

Your mumma is so stupid her IQ is 40.

Q: What did the man do when he won the lottery? A: He kept it for himself and left his family.

Where did Susie go during the bombing? EVERYWHERE

A horse walks into a bar... The bartender is amazed at the fact that an animal that possesses neither the mental nor the physical abilities to open doors, still managed to enter the bar without breaking anything.

do want to hear a joke? Women's rights

Knock Knock Who's there? Orange. Orange who? The orange that can talk and knock on doors.

How do you stop a bus? Press the brakes

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding A Duck in your apple! What is worse than finding a duck in your apple? Finding a racist in your apple! Whats worse than finding a racist in your apple? DEATH

Q: whats the fastest way to a woman's heart? A: A knife to the ribs...

Nicolas Cage's acting.

What do you call a black man speeding away in a Ferrari. A wealthy man who is late for work.

What is black, white, and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

Why couldn't the mexican buy a boat? Because he couldn't afford it

u jelly?

What's the shittiest thing ever ? Poop.

Why did the girl fall of the swing? Because she was shot in the face by a lone gunman.

violets are red my name is bob this poem makes no sense microwave

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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