Why didn't little jimmy take out the trash? He is a rock

Why can't Hellen Keller play hide and go seek? Because she is dead.

Once upon a time, there was a a loving couple. When they first kissed, the girl's heart skipped a beat, but it wasn't because of love. It was a heart murmur. She died. The end.

If you're happy and you know it go to hell.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it died! Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey!!

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven ate the chicken.

what the difference between Obama and osama bin laden nothing

Why did the blonde go to business school? She wanted to get into business, and decided that a business degree was a good place to begin.

Why did the boys uncle stop calling him? His uncle died of cancer 3 months ago.

Why did Kelly never see Wass? cus she never looked in right places !!!

How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? I don't know, that's why I was asking.

Roses are red Violets are blue NO SHIT EINSTEIN!

What's the difference between an ostridge? It can neither fly.

Why'd the chicken cross the road? The chicken doesnt understand the concept of a street so it was most likely just wandering across the street

Q: What did one candle say to the other? A: Nothing, the mere thought of candles being able to possess the ability of speech is preposterous beyond any of the highest capabilities known to man.

Jason Connor.

u jelly?

the jokes are repetitive on this site

Why did the chicken cross the road? I threatened to throw a fridge at it

What's funnier than 24? 9/11

Moral below, I understand you are one of us, but you are not supposed to act when I, your leader is spreading the message, if you want to risk harming the fundation behind your status as a shadow and its benefits, I suggest you cease signing your comments with moral. Moral the friendly neighbourhood r*pist: "Ruining the fundation behind the life of your choosing, will always end up ruining your chance to live and act freely, if you are a true shadow, then you will follow and obey"

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

Why did the homeless man cross the road? The soup kitchen has just reopened after months of rebuilding from a fire. He was very hungry.

The nurse at a hospital came out of the delivery room and chucked the baby down the hall to the father. The dad starts crying and the nurse starts laughing and said, "It's ok, it was already dead."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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