Whats the next Line? YAH YAH YAH YAH YAH....

Two men walk into a bar. One gets drunk, goes home, savagely beats his wife, and goes to jail for domestic abuse.

Q. Why can't Stevie wonder read? A. Because he is black

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Hello Carolina, let me lick your vagina.

What is the best way break up with your significant other without hurting their feelings? It is better to get it over with quickly and decisively. Gunshot to the head should do the trick.

Your mama's so stupid... She scored below average on a recent IQ test.

So after 2 years of dating, the man thought the woman actually loved him. So to find out they took a ski trip and during their day they were on the chairlift and the man asked the woman "Do you love me?" The woman replied "No...I'm just in it for the sex, but that's a nice ski mask you have on"

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the hospital? A: The victim of a violent mob attack

what do you call a man with no @ss? d1ckhead

Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, Bushes are red, HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!

Why did the baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to a chicken

What is green and has weels? A green bycicle.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He looked both ways and saw there was no traffic.

Q: Why did the girl fall off the swing? R: Because she had no arms.

What's spotty, can be found everywhere and is largely unpopular? Nothing.

Why did John go outside? His house was on fire.

once upon a time, a bird fell in love with a fish.. they both died.

What happened when the homosexual man came out of the closet? He was congratulated for winning the hide and seek contest.

In that case you are probably a bit of an outcast as most girls of your beauty are, you know, you are that kind of girl that feels weird because when she got/gets on the buss EVERYONE stares at her, but nobody dares to say anything, right? And when you are hanging out for a drink or something guys stare at you, and go like "nah" which means "Nah she is too good to want me" and starts hitting on your friends instead. Oh and you also get a lot of rude comments from guys "auto disqualifying themselves" like using complements they know will backfire like "Hey wanna fuck sugart1ts? They do this so they can go home with their ego intact thinking "Hey I was tough enough to hit on her, but she turned out to be a bitch! So does any of this sound familiar?

What happens when two elephants go out in the rain? They get wet.

Why did the fat kid drop his Mcdonalds? Because he had a stroke.

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a truck.

What's the difference between shoes and babies? You can't eat shoes.

My penis is so big that some women find it uncomfortable.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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