Q: what's better than ice cream A: not having aids

They see me rolling' Up my sleeves for some volunteer work at the local shelter

Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted. You're adopt...wait what?

Batman, Superman, Spiderman and Wonder Woman walk into a bar. The bartender decides to ruin the joke by saying nothing.

What do you call two black men in bed? Twix

He I just met you, and this is crazy, but you sister just died here's her baby.

What is the difference between a boyscout and a Jew? Boys outs come home from camp.

How come the blind black guy couldent read because he is dead

what did you call a bench full of white guys? The NBA

I just farted, and now I have to Chit!

I came home from my doctor`s appointment today, I told my sister that I was diagnosed with The Super rare "Spontaneous Erections Syndrome" (S.E.S) a very rare disease that can seriously impair the victims life in general, especially the social life, as symptoms may show themselves even among friends, pets, grandmas, enemies, and even close family! She told me that everybody knows I a just a kinky pervert with bulge so big it scared girls away instead of attracting them. Excuse me, what the hell is patient confidentiality good for if my doctor is going to call my sister and tell her everything she said to me afterwards?!

Where did a homeless man find his easter eggs? In the bin.

Q: what's brown and rhymes with snoop? A: Dr. Dre

What did the man say when he was asked if he recently saw a mime painting a lawn chair in the middle of December? "No." , and walked away, slightly confused by the matter.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 is a homophobe and 7 is a little fruity.

An Atheist and a Christian are walking along a sidewalk going in opposite directions when suddenly the Atheist sneezes. The Christian says "God Bless You!" Even though the Atheist doesn't believe in God he understand that the gesture was a kind one and so he nods and politely says "Thank you!" before going on about his day.

An Asian fails their maths exam.

You have 5 $1 dollar bills. Your mom rapes you and you still have 1 $5 dollar bill.

Why was Why added to why? Because WHy not.

What's Chris Benoit up to? Just hangin' with his family

Why couldn't little Jessica open the door? It was locked

i'm funny

Why isn't pluto a planet anymore? Nasa decided it was too small

why can't helen keller drive? Because she is deaf and blind.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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