Why did Sally fall off her bike? Because she had no legs. Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. What did Sally get for Christmas? Cancer. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally...

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Q, whats worst then being trapped in a house with a ghost. A, being trapped in a house with thirteen ghosts.

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Your mother is so fat that she once ate an entire peach cobbler in one sitting and chastised herself yet again for her lack of self-control over her eating habits and her need to fill the holes in her self esteem with the short-lived gratification she gains from eating too much of the foods she finds tasty.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? You're in-laws. Bet you wish I said banana

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You have 5 $1 dollar bills. Your mom rapes you and you still have 1 $5 dollar bill.

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What does Tupac and Elvis Presley have in common? They're dead but most of the people think they aren't.

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Q: What Would You Call Someone Who is 6 Foot and hairy. Answer: By His Or Her Name.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? A: It didn't, some dude ran it over.

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Q: How did the robber steal a laptop from best buy? A: With his hands

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Why did the white guy sit on the bench while the black guys were playing basketball? His mother was calling, and his AP scores were coming in that day. Those scores were important to him.

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Person 1 - Have you heard about the movie about constipation? Person 2 - No. Person 1 - It hasn't come out yet

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I suck at Poetry, show me your Tits.

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Why do Jewish people have such big noses? The nucleotides in their DNA are strung together in a certain sequence that makes them have large noses.

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what did the lonely boy get for christmas? the absence of a familly

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What do you tell someone who says they are contemplating suicide? where to find some cheap cyanide

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Why did the chicken cross the road?... To get to the other side.

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Honestly though bud, are you wasted? XD

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knock knock who's there? to to who? to whom*

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whats black and white? a zebra

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Why did the little kid color outside the lines? He had Parkinson's Disease.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Set an alarm for a reasonable hour.

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A man came home one day, drunk and feeling horny. He proceeded to the bedroom where he found his wife just getting into bed in a lace bra and sexy underwear. This turned him on even more so he cuddled up to her and whispered seductivly in her ear before kissing her neck. His wife was not in the mood for sex so she shot him

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Beacuse it was dead.

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I think people who go to see a psychiatrist need their head examining.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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