theres a giant burning orb in the sky and it can burn your flesh, it can give you diseases, it can kill you, looking directly at it causes physical pain, and we all think this is okay. we like this orb. we like to go outside and lie around on our backs when this orb is in the sky. children draw cute pictures of this levitating death orb with a smiley face on it. what is wrong with us

Why can't George Washington sit up straight? He's dead.

An Englishman, Irishman, and Jew walk into a bar. Steven Spielberg is a Jew.

Q:Why did the man throw his clock out the window A:Because he didn't like his clock

Breast cancer.

Whats worse than getting stabbed in nuts? A retarded baby that survived the abortion

Q: What's the difference between sheetrock and drywall? A: nothing. It's just two names for the same thing.

Mama Bear and Papa Bear were in court getting a divorce and the judge offered Baby Bear a choice of which parent to live with. "Do you want to live with your mother?" the judge asks. "No! She beats me." answers the baby bear. "OK, then you can live with your father." says the judge. "No! He beats me too!" cries baby bear. So Baby Bear was placed in a foster home.

Roses are red,violets are blue, im epileptic sdblkselhvefbed

why was the frog sad..... because it had a science lesson with the year 10s about the insides of animals

What did one guy say to another? Womens rights..........

Violets are Blue, Roses are Red, skip the bull$%!#, and give me head

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms

Why did John stay home from school? He died.

Hey could I ask you a question? Yes Thanks

What's a Guy Gotta Do? -Usher

What did the black man say to the white man? Hi im phill

TELL

Your mother is so fat that she is highly likely to get heart disease and/or diabetes.

What did the pedefile say to the child? Get in the van

Justin Bieber's Never Say Never 3D came out the other day. I went to see it, and it was a pretty good movie.

Jon has 50 chocolate candy bars Jon eats 45 of them. What does Jon have? Diabetes...

Nicolas Cage

What do you look for in a woman? a pulse.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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