How do you catch wet wood on fire? Ask a business owner in Ferguson, MO, to keep it in their store.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why does Mario wear coveralls? Because it makes practical sense for his full time job as a plumber.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then watch the world as they wonder how you did it

thumb_up thumb_down -2

how do you spend all your money you go buy stuff

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Roses are Black Violets are Black I am color blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why do people like anti jokes? Because their f****** funny as hell

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How many women's right's leaders does it take to change a light bulb? None. They can't change anything.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What does Chuck Noris have under his beard? A chin

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's the difference between a mole and dynamite? - Moles don't explode... unless you fill them with dynamite.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Bob: You need to push harder? Tom: Oh wow what a coincidence, that is what my wife said last night. They laugh about the irony of the situation and then return to the task at hand

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple whilst you're in a bar after finding out you have cancer when you visited your families grave? Having a refrigerator thrown at you by an aids infected monkey with no arms or legs.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

leon harney ya pikey

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anything involving women..

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Don't you sometime just want to chop of your toes and stomp around to prove to the so called 'experts' that it is possible for a person to walk without toes? . . . . . . me neither

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A man named Joe has practiced drawing cartoon characters his entire life. When Joe turns 15 he decides to enter a local drawing competeiton. Joe works very hard drawing his cartoon and finally finishes. When it is the time to hand in his drawing his drawing, he hands it in an receives a satisfying 2nd place and continues on with his life. Two years later Joe decides to enter another drawing competeiton (this one much more competitive) after his drawing skills have tremendously increased. He begins drawing and is 3/4 of the way finished when Joe is brutally murdered by a mentally disturbed man and cannot hand in his art work and is therefore disqualified from the competeiton and loses.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Random question: Whats black and white, green, and black and white? Well thought out correct answer: 2 zebras fighting over a pickle

thumb_up thumb_down -6

An Indian child is born with three arms. After being ridiculed his whole life he kills himself at age 19.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

My life :(

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's worse than getting an F on your paper? Walking in on a man wearing your mother's skin after vigorously raping her in front of your baby sister.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you call a black midget with no legs and has 11 fingers? A human being

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the little gril with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -6

whats worse than school? Summer school

thumb_up thumb_down -6

They see me rollin' Up my sleeve for some volunteer work at the local shelter

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How many mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Trick question they cant afford one.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops