What's the difference between a baby and a mushroom? One is delicious, the other is a mushroom.

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Why did the guy throw a clock out his window? Because he was mentally unstable and needs help.

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24!

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There once was a man from Peru, Who fell into an extremely deep sleep and woke up just before he choked to death on his shoe rubber.

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So an irishmen, jewish, and asain walk into the bar...and the bartender said get out..

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why did little johnny scream. he was getting torn to pieces

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What is black and blue and red all over? Rihanna

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Heartlight

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Why did the baboon fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Yo mama so fat, she farts dust

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What did the black guy, the latino guy, and the asian guy all have in common? They were all human beings

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wanna here a dirty joke? Suree A white horse fell in a mud puddle dum dumdum dum duuuuuuummmm

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What do you call a bus filled with White, Chinese, and Black people? Public transportation.

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Why did someone see a penguin walking in the desert? They were dreaming, because Penguins waddle and live in the Arctic.

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Your mother is so fat, when she dives into a pool, the on duty life guard blows his whistle to get her attention. He then proceeds to tell her about the dangers of diving into a pool with the depth of 5ft or less and asks her not to continue her antics. She is not pleased but decides it is best to follow the rules.

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Woman Rights

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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Alcatraz is reopened only for Kevin's ma

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How did the fat woman survive the car accident? She had on her seat belt.

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My nigga so racist he killed a man cause he was white.

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how did superman die? he got cought in a plane engine!

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Why did Steve refuse to have sex with a black guy? Because Steve is heterosexual.

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What happened to the guy who got bullied? He commited suicide.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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