Roses are black. Violets are black. Everything is black. I'm blind.

Why did Billy go into the white van? Because his parents came to pick him up from school.

Q: What game will Helen Keller always win? A: Marco Polo. She is a fast swimmer.

why did the man fall off his bike? He got shot by the navy seals, He was a highly decorated terrorist.

knock knock who's there? Bill Bill who? Bill Smith, we went to high school together. Oh hey Bill, come on in.

Hey we just met And this is crazy But my name's Kony And I stole your baby

Roses are red violets are blue when i flush the toilet i see you :)

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Violets are Blue, Roses are Red, skip the bull$%!#, and give me head

How many ADD kids does it take to change a light bulb? Wanna ride bikes?

Did y'all see Lafell catch that pass? Neither did I

You ask a German how long it takes to go from Berlin to Amsterdam. He replies, ''About four hours by tank."

Your momma is so old that she might die soon!

--"Do you like impressions?" -Yeah! --"Why?" ................... --"That was Socr-ates."

Q: Why did the baby stop crying? A: Because it was satisfied.

Why did the little girl die Because she was kidnapped by a rapist, and defiled repeatedly, and then to get a ransom from her family the kidnapper slowly pulled out her fingernails and toenails, and sent them to the family the same thing happened with her fingers, toes, hands, feet, arms, legs, teeth, tounge, hair, and eyes, then she died of blood loss after nearly 2 months of torture.

Why couldn't the mexican feed his family? Because a large percent of mexican immigrants in the United States do not have jobs due to dicrimination against illegal immigrants crossing the soutern border, thus rendering them more vunerable to unemployment is that is vastly present in the United States.

A straight A star quarterback in his senior year of high school was about to throw the game winning pass in his season's last game and complete the school's undefeated record when he was sacked by a defender. He fell incorrectly and broke both of his legs, rendering all of his scholarships invalid. He hasn't walked since.

A man walks into a bar. ouch.

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it lost Consciousness.

What do you look for in a woman? a pulse.

Q: Have you heard from that guy who dropped a piano on his head? A: No one has, he dropped a piano on his head.

So I took this girl into my room we got in bed, We got under the covers and.... We had a rather delightful game of scrabble.

A boy walks up to a girl and says "Do you like ice cream? Cuz I have a huuuuuge penis."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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