Sticks and stones can break my bones Well maybe you shouldn't play in the tree anymore

A horse walks into a mans house. The man wonders how the horse got into his house.

Why aren't 4 black people driving a red mustang? They can't afford it.

How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? 124

"What is the sound of one hand clapping?" "I'm not quite sure, but your on fire."

Why doesn't a woman need a wrist watch? It is rapidly becoming outdated and most cellphones these days have the time, but if they like the style they are free to use one.

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? -a black man that left his family

You know what's better than a taco? A better taco.

A gay jew walked into a bar. Just kidding, for there was only a red blanket.

Hey I just met you, and this is crazy! But iI'm on bath salts and your face looks tasty!

Why did the kid tell yo mama jokes to insult other kids? His mom had just committed suicide due to depression caused by the kid's bad habits.

roses are head mydick is blue i live in somolia and i killed all the jews

Q : whats the most annoying thing on the earth with a big fore head ? A : Paige

Roses are red Violets are blue I like to slap hookers

So this farmer had theses two amazingly fast horses, one named slokey and the other pokey. They would run in the pasture and bring many people to watch. So one day this man says hey, you should enter them in the county derby. So he does and the whole race its slokey, pokey slokey, pokey, and slokey wins by a nose. So after the farmer collects his prize money a man walks up and says, hey those horses are pretty fast, you should enter them in the state derby. So he loads his horses up to the capital and prepares them. When the gates open slokey and pokey dash out of the gate. The whole race its slokey, pokey, slokey, pokey, and slokey wins by a nose. After all the press conferences a man says, hey you should enter those horses in the kentucky derby. So the farmer enters them and drives down to kentucky. The gates open and the whole time its slokey, pokey, slokey, pokey, and slokey wins by a nose. After the press meetings a man says hey you should enter your horses in the european derby. The farmer says no, im going to retire my horses. One fall afternoon pokey says to slokey, man, i wish i could have won a single race. So they race around the huge pasture and the whole way its slokey, pokey, slokey pokey, and pokey wins by a nose! All the farm animals go crazy and the farm dog says "congratulations pokey you finally won!" And pokey says "HOLY SHIT A TALKING DOG!"

What did the ketchup say to the mustard? Nothing they're just condiments.

A penis takes a trip to spain, he falls in love with an apple and proceeds to commit suicide

What's brown and sticky? The british econonic system from 2 May 1997 to 27 June 2007.

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir......my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

A dog walks into the local newspaper to place an ad. The dog writes; "woof woof, woof woof woof." Receptionist: You know you can ad another two woofs for the same price? Dog: Well that wouldn't make any sense at all?

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Leaves are green, You should know all this by now...

why did the the chicken cross the road? because some sad,board people wanted to make a joke

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a cannibal.

What do you call a smart blond? A golden retriever!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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