What happens when someone with ADD tells a joke? I forgot.

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Hey I just met? you and this is crazy I have alzheimers Hey I just met you

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roses are scarce, violets are farse, come over here and i'll stick it up ya ar#e.

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whats 2+2? 4

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whats black and white and red all over? a zebra crossing after a horrible, horrible car accident

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What is the meaning of Life, the Universe, and Everything in it? I'm not sure at rhe moment, but it will take aproximately seven and a half million years of thinking for me to find out.

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Knock Knock Whose there? Boo I don't know anyone by the name of Boo. Go away

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A man walked into a metal bar, they were playing Metallica.

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why do i have a pain in my left side i dont know but im scared

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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Two pretzels were walking down an alley way, one was assaulted. In a instinctive move, the other quickly ran away and alerted the authorities. The assaulted pretzel was severely injured but slowly recovered covered from physical trauma and has now sought professional help to deal with it's great deal of post traumatic stress.

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Deadly cancer.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer's I have Alzheimer's

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A jew is a person contending to the faith of Judaism, and a pizza is an Italian flat normally round or square baked good consisting of dough, tomato sauce, cheese and various spices, and is sometimes enjoyed with toppings such as meat or vegetables.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Want to hear an urban legend? There's a straight feminist.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? Chuck Noris

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? I t was dead. Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

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Why couldn't the black kid buy a bike? He had no money.

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Why Was Mary Short? She Had No Legs.

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Why did the fisherman die on a fishing trip? He had a heart attack.

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What's the difference between gays and straights? Sexual orientation

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Whats the hardest part of eating a vegetable? The wheelchair.

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Where do black people ride bicycles? In the Pedestrian Zone.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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