Yo mommas so fat... that when it was rainning, she put on her rain coat and went outside, everyone was saying that the sun came up

a kid named austin walks into school and gets kicked in the nuts byyy

What does Chuck Noris have under his beard? A chin

whats wors than getting hit by a car? getting raped by a giant scorpian

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it doesn't matter because he got hit by a bus before he could even make it.

whats one word that gets everyones attention? rapist,bomb,and sex

How do you stop a bus? You press the brake pedal, causing the brake pads to squeeze the tires. Which will slow the momentum of the bus to the point of stopping.

A bear and a rabbit both take a dump in the woods below an old oak tree. They look at each other, smile and nod their heads in acknowledgment of one another. The bear is first to let go of his rather large load and a loud THUMP is heard throughout the woods. Shortly after another and then another. The rabbit looks at the bear for a moment then turns closes his eyes and begins to strain. Finally the sound of what can only be described as a machine gun rattles through the wood. Looking impressed the bear looks over at the rabbit as it pops off its last few pellets. When the rabbit is finished the bear asks "Do you have a problem with the shit sticking to your fur?" The rabbit thinks for a moment then looks at the bear and says "Umm... No, not really." So the bear uses the rabbit to wipe his arse.

why did the iraqi woman bury her wedding ring in the ground? because it's the only way she could properly pay respect to the death of her husband who recently died in a group suicide bombing.

Two horses, a man with a tall bun, three lesbians, an African woman and another man wearing a clown suit come up to you in your work outfit and shriek:"Happy Casual Friday!" Okay, so maybe this went too far.

Your momma is so white, when she goes out in the sun it is necessary for her to use a lotion with an SPF greater than 30 because she burns easily and is also afraid of skin cancer.

Hey, I'm Schrödinger, and this is crazy! But here's a sealed box... the cat lives, maybe...

Whats 2+2=? ?= CHICKEN

i was driving home after work but i had to stop because an old lady wanted to cross the road..... the old lady was abused by her father as a child, and had Alzheimer's

why was joe in hospital with facial disorder? his mum hit him with a fridge

What's the same about a crouton and a pencil case? Both are used for dirty things, such as shoe tying.

Whats worse than forgetting some thing at the supermarket? your nuts being nail gunned to the wall.

Random question: Whats black and white, green, and black and white? Well thought out correct answer: 2 zebras fighting over a pickle

why did the plane crash? because fenton was driving it..."THE DEER HAD TO DIE"

Why did the airplane crash? It was hit by a flying refrigerator.

The cat climbed a tree. It didn't want to come down, so it starved to death.

YOUIR MAMA IS SO UGLY THAT SHE MIGHT WANT TO LOOK INTO PLASTIC SURGERY TO BETTER HER APPEARENCE

A young gay man comes out of the closet to his conservative, Christian parents. Everything went better than expected.

Q: What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? A: They both have handlebars except for the duck!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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