A farmer had a horse that he rode frequently. He would talk to the horse and tell it it was his closest companion. One day the farmer noticed that the horse was walking funny. So he shot it.

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Spotto

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A daring man proclaimed "Well, here goes nothing!" as his FaceBook status, and all his friends were annoyed.

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A man walks into a bar, and says ouch.

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Roses are bald Violets are bald You are bald I think you have cancer.

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Dogs in my home.

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#Hanging Degus

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Ask me if I am a bus. Are you a bus? No.

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Q: What's the difference between sheetrock and drywall? A: nothing. It's just two names for the same thing.

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what do you call a Muslim flying a plane A pilot

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There was this cat, and he was walking down this long road, knowing a dog lived on 45 lake avenue. So the cat was very careful while walking by that house so the dog and his diqqas wouldnt chase the cat, named pat. So like a rogue in the arathi basen lodge, he made his way over the stone wall and ran as quickly as he could through the muddy path of dirt. This cat was also swagged out of control, so he had mad bitches. That is where Pat was heading....... to his mad bitches. He had never met these bitches, but bought them offline on a p0rn website that said he would become the man if he purchased the mad hot bitches. When he found the bitches, he shit himself. The bitches were female dogz. if you read this whole paragraph, a fraction of your soul has been ripped out of you. UMAD? ˜´??

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Random Guy: "Oh god, why was I born with so much common sense?" God: "You must be mistaken, or else you wouldn't be asking me."

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Why did the Jew wear a beanie while playing soccer? Because he shaved his head

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If she's old enough to count, she's probably in second grade.

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What do you call it when a cigarette is brown instead of white? A niggarette

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your mother

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Wanna here a joke? Canadians.

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You are so ugly that plastic surgery may be an option for you to consider.

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Q. Why did the woman fall out of the tree? A. Cause she got laid

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"knock knock" "Come in"

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What's stronger than then the love of a mother and her child? A semi-truck

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Why did the school bus crash? The driver was a loaf of bread.

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So there are two kids in bumper cars at the local fair. A nuke was set off underground and most of the metropolitan was annihilated.

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What did batman say to robin before they got into the batmobile? Get in the batmobile.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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