Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because he was dead.

What's funny about using a shake weight? It resembles masturbating with a penis.

Q. What's short and black A. A little black kid

Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

3 guys walk into a bar....dont you think one would see it ?

What got stolen from the poor boys house... Nothing, he was so poor that he couldn't even afford any thing

Q: what did the nazi say to the other nazi A: hallo

Who enslaves small people and forces them to work in his factory all year round in ridiculous outfits. Santa

What do you call a bus filled with White, Chinese, and Black people? Public transportation.

On a scale of 1 to drunk how ten are you?

how do you stop a speeding vehicle? throw a refrigerator at it.

what is the vent wound on the ladies that can never heal???

What do you get if you cross a bulldog with a schitzu? A half breed prone to allergies and breathing problems.

yo mama is so old i told her to act her own age and she told me to shut up and get out of her house.

Where can find a man who owns a white van capable of transporting many children? Most local churches have them for mission work. I would contact a local minister.

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

If there's a clown in a blender, how do you get him out? Tostitos.

THIS IS an anti-joke.

why did one crayon give another crayon the silent treatment? because they are crayons, unable to speak

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the same wolf that had devoured the chickens' chicks singlehandedly was chasing it.

A man says to a boy. I bet you I can jump over that mountain. The boy wins the bet because it is a physical impossibility to jump over a mountain.

Why don't NBA basketball players shake hands after a game like players in NHL hockey...? ...Because it's a tradition in then NHL.

PFF! I hate that shit XD not saying that claymation cant be art, but that Plonsters or whatever is just something I dragged out of my head.

Knock Knock! Oh god Johnny, someones at the door! Hide the heroin and bail man, BAIL!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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