What's brown and sticky? Anal rape

A man walks into a bar and says he has a talking dog. He is then taken to a mental hospital and diagnosed with schizophrenia.

What did the Pornstar say to his wife? He concluded that a divorce was the way forward for both of them as, seeming as he was a pornstar, he was almost certainly having extra-maritial sexual intercourse, unhealthy for any working relationship.

What happened when the football player couldn't get his Coke from the vending machine? He got angry.

A man walks into a bar. His alcohol dependency is tearing his family apart.

What's worse than the Holocaust? Two Holocausts.

whats up fuch you bitch

Why was the man crying in prison? He missed his family and wanted to go home.

42

What's similar between a boat and a plane? Both can fly except for the boat

A middle-class family went away on vacation. While they were gone, a pyromaniac burnt down their house. Their cat was still inside.

Why w\s the English man, the French man, the German man, the Indian man, the Chinese man, the Irish man, the American man and the russian man all on a train together? They where going to the olympics.

Guy: I have a penis growing out of my crotch. Girl: Hah, sucks to be you! Guy: Yeah.

What did Helen Keller name her dog? ghuieruioytidhfdvbshdkhfjh

Q:What did the man say when he walked into a bar. A: Ouch

Bob: "Knock knock." Gerald: "who's there?" Bob: "your worst nightmare." Gerald: "your worst nightmare who?" Bob kicks open the door, kills Gerald, ties up his wife, sells his kids to slavery, and burns his house down.

Why did the teacher get mad at the student? Because he ran over him with a car.

How do you wake up lady gaga? Shoot her in the head repeatedly

My mom fell on our cat and it died.

If you have 5 dollars, and Chuck Norris has 5 dollars, you are both very poor.

What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? Toys -Lets Go MEts

Roses are red Violets are blue Your ugly

What do you call two black men in bed? Twix

Q:Why do people not live forever? A: Because they die dumbass.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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