Why was Six afraid of Seven? Because Seven was a terrorist.

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Why did the autopilot of a plane malfunction even though the pilots had engaged the switch? The pilots had taken manual control. I lied about the switch.

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If you and Chuck Norris have five dollars you both have the same amount of money.

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What's worse than a dead baby? 2 dead babies

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What has four wheels and smells like an asshole? YOU.

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How do you find a date? Look on the calendar!

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What did the snow flake which could talk say to the other snow flake which could talk None of us are the same.

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John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.

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How do you stop a bus? Press the brakes

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Why did the black girl and white guy have sex? Because they were both sexually attracted to each other.

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Aodhan peanut head Hearty

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Time to call animal control.

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whats better then 10 babies nailed to 1 tree... 1 baby nailed to 10 trees!

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why couldn't the the black man get a job? because he doesn't posses the correct work ethic.

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how many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a lightbulb? usually one but depending on the severity of the patients' case the lightbulb will be changed by a person who is willing to offer their assistance as to prevent any form of accident taking place.

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So a bunch of blondes are in a group and a murder comes by and sais, "if you want to live, answer a question right." so the blondes pick there smartest on. the first question is, what is 9+4... the blonde answers five, the crowd goes "give her another chance giver her another chance, same thing happens, she gets it wrong and the crowd goes "give her another chance, give her another chance." the murderer sais "ok fine this is your final guess, what is 2+2" the blonde goes "uuhhhhhh... 4?" And the whole crowd goes "give her another chance give her another chance

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-_- i like trains ... -_-

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What did the man say to the drug dealer? I'd like some drugs

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why was tommy so sad?............because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Q: What happened when three lions escaped from the zoo? A: Animal patrol came and tranquilized all three.. Unfortunantly one of the lions died from to much tranq.

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Why was Rosa Parks forced to sit in the back of the bus? Every seat wsa taken, and the back was her only option

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KASEEM IS CRAP AT GEARS OF WAR THIS IS NOT A JOKE ITS TRUE (FACT) PLAYSTATION IS BETTER THEN XBOX (BIGGEST JOKE EVER) IV HAD BOTH, SO SHUT UP PS3 BOYS AKA GIRLS

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what is long and bare? polonaise to the pediatric ward what is short and bald? same polonaise, 3 weeks later

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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? usually one new yorker.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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