There are two types of people in this world: those who can count and those who can't. I happen to be one of those who can.

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A lady forgot to feed her goat. When she went to feed it, It wasn't there. Why? She didn't have a goat. Another lady forgot to feed her cat. When she went to feed it, it wasn't there. Why? It died 2 days earlier. A man forgot to feed his cow. When he went to go feed it, it wasn't there. Why? They had ate it for dinner last night. A teenage boy forgot to feed his hamster. When he went to feed it, it wasn't there. Why? He spent so much time playing video games that it ate itself. So the boy had his mom make him a sandwich.

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What's black and hangs from tree's? A suicidal black man.

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What did the blind lady say to her cat? Nothing she doesn't have a cat.

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"We wear pink on Wednesdays"" -Mean Girls, 2004

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Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? No? Well, he graduated in 4 years with a degree in chemical engineering due to his diligence and good work ethic. He now has a well paying job that allows him to support his wife and two kids and to pay the mortgage on their large home.

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why harry potter, if he was a wizard?

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why did matt daly shit his pants? he had downs

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So you all no Dora right, well why is she always lost in the forest wit her friend boots? Whats the deal with the map everybody knows maps cannot talk!!!!!!!!!!!! What the heck is wrong with the makers of the show!!!!!!!!

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Q: Whats the difference between a watermelon and a infants head? A: One is fun to beat a with a hammer, and the other is the infants head.

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What do you call a someone who steals from a black guy? A thief.

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7

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How do you describe a funny man on stilts? Stand up comedy

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What has two leg, but cant walk? A paraplegic.

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Two chairs were sitting there. One chair says "Could you pass me that cup?" The other chair says "Oh my God a talking chair!"

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Whats worse then this joke? Its punchline.

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You life story is the perfect cure for insomnia. [L]

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Justin Bieber is having sex with a girl. He then awakes from this horrible nightmare.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Oh wait i screwed up, Because of u

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What's brown and sticky? Anal rape

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Roses are yellow Violets are yellow bark bark

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Why was the man crying in prison? He missed his family and wanted to go home.

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Q.sam is 18 years old, why can't she get her licence? A.because Sam is a lost dog on the street

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There was a man workin at the supermarket, when a cow with a hat entered. He realized that it couldn't be really happening and had to be a dream. Effectively: he was dreaming. Actually, he was in jail, and his execution was scheduled for that day.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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