What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Time is irrelevant in this scenario because if this question is based in the United States it is highly unlikely an elephant will be near a fence you own, let alone sit on it, an activity rarely done by elephants and usually projected by humans onto other animals.

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What happens when you feed a Mini-horse a Happy Meal? If it doesn't die choking on the plastic toy included in the meal, It will most likely develop a terminal case of horse diabetes and suffer through a slow painful dying process.

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What happened to those who survived the attack on Hiroshima? They were killed in Nagasaki

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Why did Johnny stop walking halfway to school? A fridge fell on him.

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elen degeneres is straight....

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Why do Chinese people have flat faces? Air bags.

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you know whats funny the letter Q

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Two muffins are baking in an oven. The muffins do not talk or move, because they not living.

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i ate and i ate and i was sick on the floor 8x8=64

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What happens when a rabbit is late for a very important date? Nothing, rabbits have no logical way to keep track of time.

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a lost young boy walks into a bar to ask for directions. the Bartender takes him into a room and rapes-him

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Q: What do janitors and nuns have in common? A: They can't fly.

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Roses are Purple Chickens are gray I'm color blind You have cancer I'll see you in hell Ba bye now

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Why was the little boy crying? Because a stranger shoved explosives up his butthole.

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A cow walks into the butcher shop, he looks around then mourns the loss of his brothers

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Why did the beachball get sad after it was deflated? Beachballs don't have emotions.

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Youve got to spell the name right you dead dylan fuck

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THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE!

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So a chef, a soldier, and a lawyer are riding in a plane. The pilot has a heart attack and they all die.

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a fat old hobo named da'shovant'e ate a bucket of fried chicken then killed a little girl named poopface McFergusen

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Two women are sitting quietly in a corner, minding their own business.

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Two men go hunting and one has a sudden heart attack. The other man calls 911 and immediately tells the operator his location and the nature of the emergency. Rescue workers arrive on the scene in a timely manner and the man makes a full recovery.

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girl: why do you love me? boy: i don't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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