When life hands you lemons, you should question your sanity

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Roses are Gray, Violets are Gray, I am color-blind, I hate my life

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What's red and goes pop? A clip art of the word "Pop"

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yo' momma's so fat that when she saw a doctor he told her that she was overweight.

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What do you call a black kid with dead parents? Depressed

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What lights up a soccer stadium? A soccer match.

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Two bananas are walking down the street. One says, "Nice weather we're having, isn't it?" The other banana says, "Wait a minute, fruit can't talk." The second banana turns into a dove and promptly flies away.

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Johnny Manziel is the best quarterback ever (this isn't a joke only a true statement)(this is a remake of a previous joke)

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There were 3 guys named Sean, Ryan, and Eye. They were best friends. However, things escalated when Eye slept with Sean's girlfriend and Ryan found out. Ryan felt he had to tell Sean that Eye slept with Sean's girlfriend. Ryan went up to Sean and said "Dude, Eye slept with your girlfriend!" Then Sean shot Ryan in the head before Ryan realized what he had said. Game Over

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How do gay guys have sex with women?? They dont, they are gay.

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What did the Pope say to the little boy? Look both ways before crossing the street

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once upon a time, a bird fell in love with a fish.. they both died.

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Hey I just meet you And this is crazy I took bath salts Your face looks tasty

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why did the building fall down the terrorists came back

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I hate it when sentences don't end the way you expect them potato.

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What do you call a homeless person with one leg? Rob.

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What did the thin Italian say to the fat Italian? I don't know, I can't speak Italian.

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Why did the girl put on make-up and perfume? Because she was ugly and smelled bad.

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what did the man with no arms and no legs get for christmas? a new hat

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"You've got a lot of C in your body." said the doctor. Jimmy replied with glee: "Ah that's great news, vitamin C is.." "No you've got Hepatitis C, you'll be dead within a month."

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why did the black boy read a book. Because he had a book report due next week

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Why was the black man hand cuffed by a woman cop? Because they are a married couple who feel like role play will help spark their sex life again.

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Why did the old man order the little girl into the car? Because he was her grandfather.

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Q: What is the difference between a Ginger and a shoe? A: A shoe has a sole

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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