What do dead babies and trash both have in common? They're both in my dumpster.

What is the difference between a shark and a human? A shark is a type of fish with a full cartilaginous skeleton and a highly streamlined body and a human is the only living species in the Homo genus.

Have you heard about the Polish kamikaze pilot? No, you haven't, because it would be historically and culturally incorrect.

Kid: knock knock Orphan: whos there? Kid: not your parents

A blonde, a brunette and a red head engage in a discussion on World politics. The brunette says she would like to see politicians paying more attention to the environment. The red head says she would like to see improvements in the economy. The blonde says she has to poop.

Your Mom.

Why was O.J acquitted for murder? A jury of his peers deliberated for many days and found there was not sufficient evidence for his conviction.

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Just kidding! Stephen Hawking doesn't drink.

Little kids wear superman underwear. Superman wears Chuck Norris underwear.

a man is bussy at work, when he gets called by his doctor. YOUR WIFE IS HAVING A BABY! the doctor yells. so the man runs to his car, drives home like a madman, and arrives home with his doctor holding the newborn in his arms. "congratulations" the doctor says "it's a boy" the man takes the baby in his arms and says: "but, this child is black!" his wife cheated on him and the familly breaks appart

roses are red, violets are blue, f*** you wh*re

Roses are red Violets are blue I have a knife Take off your clothes

Whats worse than an offended chicken walking around with a squirrel stapled to its back? A crusty old man with hepatitis peeing on 10 babies.

Roses are red, Violets are pretty, look at their team, Surrender at 20.

"The hills are alive..." Impossible, hills can never be alive.

Roses are red violets are orange......... Wait did I do that wrong?

How do you make a chicken fly? Throw it

Why didn't Jimmy go to school? Because Jimmy is a brick wall.

The BCS

Sophie Cameron is Gay

Q-- Why did the boy stop playing football? A -- He had to go for his tea

Wanna hear a funny joke? I can't think of one at the moment...

People could crack eggs but Chuck Norris could crack chickens.

What clicks when its out of lead ? A gun Why was the little black boy crying ? He ran out of that grape drank How do you make a dead baby float ? You take your foot of its head How do you know when your life is over ? When you start watching Twilight What is blue and sticky ? Blue Stick What do you get when you mix a dog and a cat ? Shit

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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