ask me if im a tree! NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Why did it take so long for the baby's to paint my wall? I didn't throw them hard enough.

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Why did Timmy fall off the swings? -Because he had no arms Knock knock! Who's there? Not Timmy

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A man walks into a bar. He then meets some friends and has a rather enjoyable night.

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What do black people and apples have in common? They are both fruit... except for black people

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Little girl and a pedofile walk into the woods at night. Little girl says, "mr pedofile im scared" pedofile responds " you think your scared? i have to walk out of here alone."

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how did they guy with no legs in the wheel chair walk? he couldnt because he had no legs.

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Roses are red My name is Dave This makes no sense Microwave

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"I have some good news and some bad news, which do you want to hear first?" The good news. "There is no bad news." Then what's the bad news? "There is no bad news.

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What number comes after 29? 30.

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what do u say when u meet somebody new hello

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Why are black people ghetto? Because they are black.

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what is long and bare? polonaise to the pediatric ward what is short and bald? same polonaise, 3 weeks later

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Why was the blonde sent to prison? Well there could be a number of reasons, but I for one do not know this specific blonde so I can not help you.

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Why is Steven so gay? Because hes actually Richard Simmons

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what did the boy say to the girl? make me a sandwich.

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If you and Chuck Norris have five dollars you both have the same amount of money.

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Why were the black man's balls so big He had testicular cancer

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If I had a gun with only 2 bullets, and was in a room with Hitler, Osama Bin Laden, and you; i would shot Hitler and Osama because they committed terrible crimes

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was Friday night (or Halloween or St. Patty's Day) and the chicken was at a party. He got totally drunk, and then got the bright idea that it would be okay to drive home. On a rural two-lane highway, his vehicle careened into the oncoming traffic lane, and then the ditch, thus crossing the road. Fortunately, he walked away with only a few scratches. However, he was cited for wreckless driving, and got a DUI as well.

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A black man walks into an abbatoir.

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Why did the man cross the road? To attend his wife's funeral.

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Why w\s the English man, the French man, the German man, the Indian man, the Chinese man, the Irish man, the American man and the russian man all on a train together? They where going to the olympics.

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O: How do you kill a black man? A: Shoot him

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops