What's worse, a dog dying or cancer? The Holocaust.

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Your mom.

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Lol! Why you wanna know?

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What did the skeleton say to the vampire? Nothing because a skeleton wouldn't have a larynx.

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Your mum is so overweight, she is at risk of heart disease, I highly recommend she visits her GP.

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Why was the homeless man begging for money? Because he needed money to buy liquer for his severe alcohol addiction that was slowly destroying his liver.

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knock knock... who's there? your grandmother, now please let me in it's very cold outside. *you now proceed to open the door for your grandmother as she is elderly and you dont want her to freeze

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knock, knock! No answer, they probably can't hear you, use the doorbell.

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Once there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

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What do you call a black baby? A nigglet

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Why did the clown fall off the swing? He got shot.

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What's black, white, and red all over? Half of a dalmatian.

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spell backwards: taco cat

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Meow.

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A visibly exhausted and distressed man walks into a bar and orders a strong drink. "Long day?" the bartender asks. Since the man understands the meanings of most common phrases he responds in the correct and expected manner.

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YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

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An apple a day keeps a check next to the "I ate an apple today" box on my "what I did today" daily checklist.

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crap!!

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" Hey you have something on your face. " ( man speaking punches the guy he was talking to ) " It was pain."

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2 tomatoes walk across a road tomato 1 gets hit by a car tomato 2 gets confused, because tomatoes don't have legs and therefore cannot "walk across a road" And furthermore, a tomato does not have a brain, and thus cannot get confused.

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a black man kills a family member of a mexican guy. the mexican guy goes to the police, what happens? The mexican guy gets deported back to his country after they realize that he was illegal

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Q. What do you call 2 black men on a bike? A. Organised Crime

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Text me back when you can. I can't, my fingers got amputated.

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How did the black kid drop out of highschool? He got bad grades.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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