What happens if you shoot a chicken? It dies.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? because she was SHITFACED!!!!

Why did the little boy enter the white van, then leave scarred for life? He was going on a family trip within the said white van, but along the way they got in a horrible accident which involved a bus, a tractor, and finally a steamroller. The boy quickly escaped at the last second only to watch his family scream as the steamroller slowly crushed the van where they were trapped inside. He then broke down into tears and depression and finished it all by jumping off a bridge. It was a truly tragic incident.

What worse than the holocaust? Danny's.

what do u call blue fluff? blue fluff

What's the cookie monster's favorite kind of cookie? Oreos

your mom is like a lowling ball, she likes to be fingered then thrown back into the gutter

I want to stick ma dick in a big bowl o puddin'

What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? You aren't married to a girlfriend.

Why did the boy lose his watch? Who cares? It was a shitty-ass watch.

Why was Luke named Luke Skywalker? Because he walks to skies.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

pinky ponky went a bit wonky oh no plz dont go or i will rape you untill you know

whats purple and has legs? Nothing, i lied about both

Is this the krusty krab? NO! THIS IS red lobster, how many i help you?

Why was the toddler laying in the middle of the road? Because she was the victim of a hit and run...

i like turtals and kids

one day i went to bed

What has the head of a lion, the body of a mule, and the penis of a seal? Nothing... what the hell did you think it was? Are you on drugs or something?

Why did the pedophile cross the road? To molest a child.

What did the Africans get for dinner? Nothing.

Brooklyn Nets or New Jersey Nets? Theres a difference

What do you call a kid with no arms and no legs? names.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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