You are so ugly that plastic surgery may be an option for you to consider.

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A short Irish man and a tall German man went skydiving. Both parachutes coincidentally failed to deploy and they died.

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A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked, "Why the long face?" The horse did not reply because he was incapable of speech.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Roses are green I'm bipolar

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Hey i just met u And this is crazy I have Alzheimer's Hey i just met u

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If your uncle helped you off An horse, would you help your uncle jack off an horse?

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What's big, black and hard to swallow? A bowling ball.

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If you shaved Chuck Norris' beard, you'd find a chin.

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matty russel are you on here

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A black man, a Jew, and a homosexual are at a bar together. They drink for a few hours, during which time they catch up with each other and share stories, as it has been some time since the three of them have seen each other. After they are done drinking, they call a friend, who comes to pick them up and take them home. What a fine example of drinking responsibly.

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How many cows does it take to put in a lightbulb? Well, you see, it depends how many cows it takes to put in a lightbulb.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Sir, your wife has been killed. Please open the door so that we may discuss this matter. The man then opens the door and listens to the tale of how a disgruntled worker opened fire in a grocery store, killing 13 people including his wife. Unable to cope with this and the fact both his parents passed away earlier that year he later hangs himself soon after the police leave.

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What's the difference between Izzy and a hobo? Nothing...they both have no job and no friends

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Tom and Phill are eating ice cream Tom challenges Phill to a contest to see who can eat their ice cream in one bite Tom finishes his in two bites Phil in one Then he looks like he got a brain freeze Tom notices and says "You idiot: you got brain freeze!" Phill turns around and says "No, I have a brain tumor."

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Q. what is catness and pita name together pines

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A man walks into a bra. Bra kills him...

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roses are red violets are blue i am retarded i like pancakes

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what is the difference between Stephani and a whale? A whale is skinnier... get the harpoonns

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brandon ya twwat

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An Englishman, Irishman, and Jew walk into a bar. Steven Spielberg is a Jew.

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give one word to discribe a man who has been in combat for 10 years and finnaly gets home to his family and he chokes and dies on piece of brockly. Irony

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Your mom is so fat, it is unlikely that she will be able to survive the month without experimental liposuction and heart surgery, and even then her outlook is bleak. I am so sorry.

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You know whats worse than finding 3 dead children in your house? Finding 2 dead children in your house.

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why was the panda sent to prison? he played a major roll in the bombing of 9-11

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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