Roses are red,violets are blue, im epileptic sdblkselhvefbed

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A blonde, a brunette and a red head engage in a discussion on World politics. The brunette says she would like to see politicians paying more attention to the environment. The red head says she would like to see improvements in the economy. The blonde says she has to poop.

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What is large, white, and can't climb trees? A refrigerator.

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What do you call a black guy driving a Mercedes through New York? A U.S. Citizen

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Why was the old man on the floor? He fell

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What is brown and gurgles? dead baby casserole

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to hit with a bat and the others a watermelon

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A turtle that couldn't swim walked to Japan.

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What do a magazine and a banana have in common? They both have pages, except for the banana.

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Yo momma so fat, people snicker as they walk past her, quietly laughing at a women obviously struggling with obesity. They then proceed to stop laughing, as they realize that their mother died from diabetes. They then proceed to move on with their day.

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What's red and has two legs? Half a cat!

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Why did the white kids accept Morgan Freeman as a kid? All of his school-mates looked up to him

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What do you call an englishman who wakes up in Africa Confused

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Roses are red, Violets are blue when I saw you what the heel are you

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What is the secret to winning football games? Score the most points.

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Q:how many anti jokes does it take to make a person lough A:1

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Whats green and has wheels? A green honda

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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What do you call a black man speeding away in a Ferrari. A wealthy man who is late for work.

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how many babies does it take to paint a house? that is child labor, which is illegal in many countries.

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How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because she was dead.

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i dont know why but when ever i see jew they always say "whats up?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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