Whats worse than finding a spider in your shower? Getting repeatedly stabbed in the dick by a rapid chipmunk.

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Q: Why did the little Canadian girl start crying ? A: Because her mum through a fridge at her.

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Q:How many babies does it take to paint a room? A:It depends how hard you throw them

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What has feet but cannot walk? What has a beak but cannot peck? What has wings but cannot fly? A dead bird.

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How many dead babies fit into a bathtub? 23

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why did the iraqi woman bury her wedding ring in the ground? because it's the only way she could properly pay respect to the death of her husband who recently died in a group suicide bombing.

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Q. You know what sucks A. Being an orphan

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YOUIR MAMA IS SO UGLY THAT SHE MIGHT WANT TO LOOK INTO PLASTIC SURGERY TO BETTER HER APPEARENCE

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There's a plane with 5000 bricks in it, one falls out. How many bricks are on the plane now? 4999 How do you get an elephant in the fridge? U open the fridge,put the elephant in and close the fridge. How do you get a deer in the fridge? Open the fridge, take the elephant out and close the fridge. A lion is trowing a party and the whole animal kingdom shows up, what animal isn't there? The deer cause he's still in the fridge. A little old lady is walking threw an alligator and snake invested swamp. *The snakes and alligators eat her (wrong answer) The brick falls on her head

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Are you gay? No. Ok.

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When life throws you lemons, duck.

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Why didn't the black guy where a seat belt? I don't know but he should've because hes dead.

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Why wasn't the black guy allowed into the bar? Because the bar was closed.

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Why did Hitler kill six million Jews? Because one of them looked at him funny.

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What's red and smells like a rose? Bumble-bees licking honey off of a stick.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

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Q: Do you know what really makes me smile? A: Facial Muscles.

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--Knock Knock Who's there? --Banana Banana who? --Knock Knock You just said that --Sorry i have Alzheimer's

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what do you call a tall skiny kid with a very big ego autistic.........colby schluter.

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There's a bunch of people standing around a retard...why is no one laughing? Its his funeral

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What's the difference between a mole and dynamite? - Moles don't explode... unless you fill them with dynamite.

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What was the Latino man doing on my laptop? He was my friend and he had asked me first. He was also ordering a computer on amazon for himself.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Interrupting Doctor Interru- You have cancer.

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Two people are walking down the street, unaware of the highly polluted environment and that they could save a life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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