How do you get a dog off of your roof? Shoot it.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Does this cloth smell like chloroform to you!

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There is a middle-eastern man in customs with a turban and a briefcase and he is profiled by his race which is a sad fact of our society.

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How many 1 ft dwarfs does it take to climb up a 55 ft ladder? Only one. It's just a ladder. All you gotta do is climb up it.

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What's the difference between a McDonald's and Michael Jackson? One is a fast FOOD restaurant, while the other likes having sex with little boys.

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THAT MAN EATS TOO MUCH. therefore he is overweight.

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whats red and bad for your teeth... A brick.

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a man walked into a bar ouch

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a bed? A: The victim of a serious car accident in a hospital bed.

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What does a Jewish Santa Clause say? This scenario is highly improbable as Jews celebrate Hanukkah and not Christmas.

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What do you call a black priest? Someone devoted to the word of god

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What did the chemist say when his BBQ ran out of charcoal? Nothing interesting.

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How do you stop a Polish army on horseback? With artillery.

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like a someboyyyyyyyyyyyy

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Knock Knock Whose there? Boo I don't know anyone by the name of Boo. Go away

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An under aged man walks into a bar. the bar tender forgets to ask for his ID and gives him a beer. That man was later fired.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? He didnt.

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Why didn't the boy get what he wanted for christmas? His parents had killed him.

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Why do black people eat so much fried chicken? Because it's delicious!

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Can I ask you a question? You just did

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A man dressed in a business suit goes into a doctor's office. He asks the receptionist how much a vasectomy would cost. After a minute of her looking it up on the computer she turns to him and says "The procedure will cost $750." He then thanks her and leaves.

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What do you call somebody from Manchester? A twat

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An early Jewish man walks into a bar where a number of stormtroopers have gathered for drinks and is taken into custody and then delivered by railcar to a camp where he and other persecuted minorities are deliberately imprisoned in a relatively small space with inadequate facilities where they await their mass execution.

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so dont touch it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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