- Anti Joke

What's brown and sticky? Caramel.

So there are 5 people on a plane the president, a movie star, and man who is on the verge of making world peace, the smartest man in the world, and the pope the piolt has a heart atack at and the plane will crash soon there are only 4 parachutes. So the first is Obama and he saysI won a Nobel piece prize and I run American see ya later and he takes the parachute next Steven hawking says sory pope Im taking this because I don't believe in God and black holes are cool so he takes the parachute and jumps out. Next Charlie Sheen says I need to entertain people and keep the drug dealers in business so he. Takes the parachute and jumps out. Then Francis turns to the hippie and says if you achive world peace it may help eliminate some poverty so you take the last paratute and jump out then the hippie says in return no its OK Steven Hawking took my back back. When they land they decide to serch for Steven's body and they find nothing. You see Steven Hawking had taken his own paratute with him and took the Hippies backpack to sell it and make some money

What doesnt have arms and legs? A brick.

Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

Why do everytime I go to toilet for number 2. I look into the toilet to see if this one's nicer than the last one.

What did the man do when he was tired Nothing he went to bed

Why does a snake have eyes? To see!

Q:what has two legs and bleeds A: a dog cut in half

What did the cat say when you rub it's stomach? Nothing because felines don't have the needed vocal organs to speak, and probaly wouldn't know english do to the size of there brain.

what did bob say tothe ugly duckling? your ugly and a duckling

Where do snowmen keep their money? Snowmen don't have money

I walked a few Km from home.. Something stops me in my tracks, there lies A LIE!

knock knock who's there doctor doctor who No

Why are rich guys gay? They can afford to be

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names! ba dum chzz

How many Jews can you fit in a Volkswagen Bug? Four, maybe 3, depending on the size of each person.

Why do gay guys like push pops? Because they are a delicious lollipop treat.

What do you call a group of black people? A group, you racist.

Why can't Sean slam dunk cos he has no arms -•#21

What does Tourettes Syndrome have in common with short term memory loss? I DON'T FREAKING REMEMBER.

Yo mom so fat that even Torres won't miss her

Why did the girl fall off her bike? Someone threw a piano at her.

THAT MAN EATS TOO MUCH. therefore he is overweight.

Why did the chicken cross the road. Because, It can't fly

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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