How do you make a sandwich? You don't, you have a girl do it for you.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Does this smell like chloroform to you?

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What is invisible and smells like carrots? The smell of Carrots. Pretty sure you can't see smells.

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Whats long, hard, and has cum in it? Cucumber

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Whats an Anti Joke

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Q: Why does my arm itch? A: I got bit on the arm by a mosquito

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Why do babies cry on airplanes? Because gay people are getting married.

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What happened to the boy with AIDS? He died at the age of 12

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There once was a man from Nantucket But then he moved to Boston and changes his name to "man from Boston"

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Cut the rope.

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Me: Sometimes I like to talk to myself. Me: So do I.

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Whats worst than getting raped by an old man? -Nothing, getting raped is probably the worst thing to happen to you.

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What did the midget get for Christmas? A new watch and a gift card for Applebee's.

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"Free to play" Play free "right now"

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What ruined the little boy's day? He drowned.

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One day a black man, a white man, and an Asian man decide to bet on who has the longest penis. The white man wins by 1/18th of an inch, effectively disproving the stereotype. They all go home a little gayer for the experience.

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A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

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What did Jennifer get in her college exam? She got a C minus

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Who is worse than Justin Bieber? Hitler

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-if you're American in the kitchen, British in the living room, what are you in the bathroom? -in the bathroom.

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On Friday the 13th,I had one of those dreams of when you go to school in your underwear. I then realised it wasn't a dream.

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what's red, blue, and white all over? The American Flag

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Roses are red,violets are blue, im epileptic sdblkselhvefbed

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Matt is not funny.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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