Kid: mom what happens when grandpa farts? Mom: well son... Everyone leaves the room

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25

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How do we achieve world peace? KILL EVERYBODY. Nobody can fight when they're dead.

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A mother is in the kitchen making dinner for her family when her daughter walks in. “Mother, where do babies come from?” The mother than explains to the daughter the logistics of sex. The daughter seems to comprehend and walk away leaving the mother to cook.

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why did the feminist cross the road? To suck my D***

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Shmellmype. Shmellmype who? HAHAHAHAHA (read out loud)

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How do you keep a puppy warm? You throw it in the fire...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I wouldn't consider Mark a chicken. In fact, given the high speed and volume of cars traversing that particular road in both directions, I'd say it was a ballsy move. In hindsight, though, he probably should have waited for the "walk" symbol to appear for pedestrians, in order to avoid being run over by a bus. Anyway, if Pastor John would like to say a few words before we finally put Mark's body to rest...

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What do you get when Chuck Norris meets Chuck Norris? A bad joke.

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What did my wife say when I asked her to pick up some milk on her way home from work? OK

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The mighty wizard said "come fourth cowardly lion and receive bravery" but he came fifth and got absolutely nothing. Todo came fourth and got the bravery.

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What do you call a man named Jimmy? Jimmy

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Why do Vampires Sparkle in the Sunlight? They don't read a proper Vampire Novel and see for yourself.

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Yo momma is so fat, that she is not able to wear the clothes she wore the previous year.

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What is small, black, and loved by children? An oreo.

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i jack off in the school bathroom #yolo -toby limbers

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Why did the child cross the road? Her parents were abusing her and she wanted to get hit by a car.

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Does your face hurt? Because if it does, you might want to see a doctor.

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What kind of a prediction is THAT?

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What's better than winning a gold medal in the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Nothing, he died.

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What's the difference between a red Ferrari and a pile of deal babies? The red Ferrari is not in my garage right now.

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Your mom is so hairy that she must not feel comfortable in her everyday life.

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Three blondes are stranded on an island. They all die from starvation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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