Why was Sally crying She got a high five In the face With a chair

Whats the differance between a lawnmower and a sack of dead babies? I dont have a lawnmower in my garage

Whats small, red and white, and would kill you if shot out of a cannon? A decapitated baby

What do you call a mexican with a broom in his hand? a man who likes to keep his office at his own company clean

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I thought I was ugly But then I met you

What is the difference between a cow and a human? A lot of things.

what do you call a man with no legs? disabled.

why did your parents die? because I thought it was funny...

What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? 12:00

did you hear about the man who crossed the road? he made it.

What do you call to guys who gave gave each other HIV? Blood-Brothers

Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted. You're adopt...wait what?

What did the lawyer say to a lawyer? We're both lawyers.

A Muslim, a Jew, and a Christian find a magical lamp with a genie inside. He offers each of them one wish. The Muslim wishes that people didn't look at his people as terrorists. The Jew wishes that the Holocaust never happened, and the Christian wishes for world peace. Actually this didn't happen, Genies don't exist.

Why couldn't little Sally fall asleep? She was on fire.

How do you kill a blonde? you shoot her.

What did the Democrat say to the Republican? "I am sorry about your mother". They had been good friends since childhood and the Republicans mother was soon to die from terminal cancer.

Q: Why did Little Suzie fall off of the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Little Suzie!

Why did the chicken cross the road Time for you to get a watch

what do you call a black man drinking cool-aid? thirsty.

There are 3 poeple on an air plane. The pope, a boy scout, and barak obama. The plane is about to crash and there is only 2 parachutes. omba said im the president of the united states and one of the worlds smartest african americans so he jumped out. The Pope told the boy scout " i lived a long happy life you take the last parachute and jump." The boy scout replied what there are still 2 left the " worlds smartest negro jumped out with my backpack.

The shopkeeper said to a customer, "It's raining cats and dogs!" The customer said, "Okay, I'll take eight of them."

Once upon a cross

Q: What do you call a grammatically incorrect horse? A: An horse

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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