i lost the game

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If you have 24 hours to live what would u choose to do? I would choose to take stander ised testing b/c it feels like it's forever.

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A man laughs creepily and another man asks him what he's doing he says I have a creepy laugh so the man asks him why he was laughing the man says there's a boy over there that has a frog stapled to his face!!!!!!!!!

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Knock Knock Who's there? its the police mam your son has been killed by a hit and run driver, the driver was an alcohol

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Q: What comes first the chicken or the egg? A: Pineapple.

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Robocop and T-800 argue over who can run the fastest, Robocop claims he is the fastest, while T-800 says that he is the fastest. To settle things once and for all, they start a race. At first T-800 seems to be leading Then the T-800 is leading by a great distance. moments later the T-800 has a huge lead. But then suddenly, without any warning, the race shifts! T-800 is now leading only by a great distance! Yet in a amazing, and completely unexpected plot-twist. T-800 wins! Moral: :O

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What did the 5 cent store clerk say to the customer? That will be 5 cents.

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What's the difference between a large pizza and a Mexican? A large pizza can feed a family.

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They say the human body is comprised of 70% water, it's more like... 60% because I'm dehydrated if know what I'm saying... I should really drink some water.

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How do you make a basketball team short You cut off their legs

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What did the table say to the human? Nothing, tables don't talk.

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Why is there a dead pakistani on my couch? Because someone put him there.

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What do Helen Keller and Stevie Wonder have in common? They're both well known figures who have inspired many.

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A muslim walks pass a bomb shop on his way to the international peace club.

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Bison: I just dont feel like having bread for breakfast again Sagat: You want some... Cornflakes? Bison: Ohohoh Ahahaha! Sagat: You like it? Bison: THIS IS DELICIOUS! Balrog: :( What about those tapes I made for you? You want me to...:( Bison: Balrog, shut up.

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Whats worse than dying? Nothing.....?

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how do you get out of a room with no windows or doors? you don't.

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Pitbull is Mr. Worldwide because his music sucks everywhere in the world

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Three politicians walk into a sports bar. Suddenly, everyone is watching the Stanley Cup playoffs.

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A. Do you know what they call Bing Crosby in Sweden? B. No. A. Bing Crosby.

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? I hate niiggers ?

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What do a blond and a jar of marmalade have in common? Nothing, they are completely different.

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The man asks the blind man "where ya going"b The Blind man replies "i dont know".

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Q: what animal didnt get on Noah's ark in pairs? A: worms. they got on in apples.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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